


Running on Empty

by bootlegtruth



Category: iKON (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Anal Sex, Blowjobs, Denial, Feelings, M/M, Smut, basically they choose to fuck instead of talking about things, handjobs, sometimes they don't even make sense, they are so immature
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-12
Updated: 2019-11-16
Packaged: 2021-01-29 08:22:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 23,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21407137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bootlegtruth/pseuds/bootlegtruth
Summary: In which Hanbin finds himself in a series of push and pull with Bobby, as he tries to run away from a regret that haunts him.
Relationships: Kim Hanbin | B.I/Kim Jiwon | Bobby
Comments: 51
Kudos: 191





	1. i

**Author's Note:**

> I love clichés! This wasn't supposed to be chaptered but I really wanted to publish it now and it was so damn long. Kinda annoying. Anyway, second part will probably be up tomorrow, or the day after, or the day after, y'all know how the calendar works.
> 
> Also, abundant flashbacks from Hanbin's point of view so you'll know where he's coming from.
> 
> This fic was also translated in Vietnamese by a lovely reader. Check it out here: https://my.w.tt/hFy6aWwTQ6

Bobby was fast to catch on the news this time.

Hanbin whines as soon as he sees his face, stomping his feet to the ground while wiping the dirt off his coat with a handkerchief. He glares at Bobby.

"Looks like someone went in for a swim." Bobby smirks at him, crossing his arms while leaning on the rails of the balcony in the art room.

"This is Chanel." Hanbin points at his trench coat and then pouts. "Ruined by some stupid bastard who can't bother to look where he's going." he rolls his eyes, still pouting.

Bobby walks up to him, grinning. He removes his own tweed jacket and puts them atop both of Hanbin's shoulders. "I'm gonna buy you another one. For the meantime, wear this. It's Chanel too." 

Hanbin removes his soiled coat to put on Bobby's properly. "It's custom made. I doubt that. Thanks anyway." he scrunches his nose at him, and then he leaves.

It wasn't like this before. Bobby wasn't one to answer his whims, spoil him with things he knows he likes, _exploit_ him. As a matter of fact, Bobby never really paid attention to him that much.

Their parents were friends, business partners even, and as such, their children are required to be acquaintances, to know each other as they spend time...to be friends. That wasn't the case with Hanbin and Bobby. 

Hanbin had spent more time in Bobby's house than his own, being an only child, they made it a point for him to make friends with children of his age. The said child of his age was one boy, tall, lean, and wasn't interested in him one bit, always holed up in his room playing video games by himself.

He assumed Bobby didn't like him. It never bothered him though, he's glad to be in Bobby's house, especially whenever Bobby's cousin, Junhoe, was there. Hanbin also figured out Bobby didn't like Junhoe. Whenever the two boys would cross paths in the living room, Junhoe would greet him and Bobby would only nod. 

Hanbin wondered what on Earth could Bobby possibly like. He seemed to hate everything around him.

It wasn't until Hanbin caught him. They were 14. He was on his way home, staring outside the window of their Benz. 

Bobby was with a girl, someone much older than the both of them, and a bunch of other guys he deemed unworthy of Bobby's presence. They were smoking. Hanbin asked to stop the car as he got off, determined to talk to Bobby for once.

"Jiwon. I'm here to pick you up." he says with his head held up high. 

Bobby glares at him, throwing the used cigarette on the ground, almost hitting his newly bought Armani's. 

"Oh, Bobby, you didn't tell me you brought your little boyfriend." the older woman giggles. 

Bobby scoffs. "He's not my boyfriend." 

Hanbin just wanted to grab Bobby's arm and take him to the car with him so they can go home. The smell of the smoke was killing him.

"Well, if you don't want him. He can be mine." the other guy from Bobby's group put his arms around him. 

Hanbin tried to push him off but he was too strong so he let him be. Instead, he tried with words. "Personally, I think this group of friends you have right now doesn't suit you. They're stinky and disgusting and just leeching off your money because—" 

He got punched. His hand flew to his busted mouth and he saw blood. Before he could react Bobby was throwing punches too at the guy beside him. The one who hit him. And he couldn't call for him. He couldn't tell him to stop. 

Everything spun. Maybe it's all in his head, but the last thing he saw before he blacks out was Bobby. Very bloody Bobby.

Something must've happened that day. During his blackout. Because that would explain why they were inseparable since. Bobby finally talks to him at school. Bobby rides in their Benz and they go home together. Bobby lets him play video games with him in his room, the first time he had ever gone inside. Bobby surprised him on his 18th birthday, a party he planned out with all their friends. And now, Bobby's still with him in college. Bobby had always been there. Still, something inside him wasn't content.

"Where have you been?" Yunhyeong asks him, looking at his clothes and then back at his face.

"Changed my clothes." he dismisses.

Yunhyeong looks at him suggestively, like he knows he was wearing Bobby's clothes. He shakes his head. "Drop it." 

Yunhyeong snickers. "And I wonder why you guys aren't together." 

Hanbin rolls his eyes. _It's because Bobby's somewhere all over some guy or girl like the flirt that he is._ He wants to answer but he closes his mouth.

Bobby was indeed with some guy. His hands were wrapped around Kim Donghyuk's waist, whispering in his ears that made the shorter guy giggle. Bobby winks at him as they pass by each other on the hallways and he couldn't help but glare. 

"Is it bad that I really want to choke him?" he asks Yunhyeong, busy filling his lockers with books. 

"Like in a kinky way?" 

He ignores him. "He just gets on my nerves." he closes his locker with a loud thud.

"Try fucking him. So you can get over it." Yunhyeong suggests casually.

Hanbin feels his cheeks burn. He punches Yunhyeong's arm as he rolls his eyes. "I would never let his disease-riddled dick anywhere near my ass." 

  
///////

  
"So, Donghyuk, huh?" 

He was lying down on Bobby's bed, laptop on his thighs, working on a powerpoint presentation. Bobby was on his desk, typing vigorously like he has to meet a deadline.

"Yeah, he's cute." Bobby says nonchalantly. 

Hanbin shrugs, fixing his glasses, which has no prescription, he just thinks he looks fashionable with it. "Whatever." 

Bobby turns his swivel chair to face him. "I can stop flirting with him if you want." 

"What do you mean if I want?"

"You're the one who told me to flirt with him, remember? You said, and I quote '_go bother someone else, like that guy or something_' and you pointed at him." 

Hanbin scoffs. "Are you like, for real?" 

Bobby laughs at him, dragging his chair to get close to the bed where Hanbin was sitting. "Just say you want me, Bin. I would drop everyone for you." 

He narrows his eyes at Bobby, smirking at him, fingers tapping on the bed and close to his hips. "I doubt." he says, continuing whatever he was doing.

"God, you look good on my bed." Bobby moves his chair back to his desk. 

Hanbin spaces out.

Bobby had been like this ever since the incident years ago. Always telling him things he doesn't believe. Or doesn't want to. Like how Bobby says he wants him. That he thinks about him everyday. That he'll choose him over anything else. 

Hanbin wants to like the idea of it. Bobby was always one call away. Bobby attends to him, be it when he needs a shopping companion or when he needs new clothes because someone had spilled their coffee in his, like a while ago.

Even if Bobby does all these things, he can't bring himself to fully enjoy it. There's something in his chest that doesn't feel right. Something that only Bobby could answer but he was too afraid to ask. 

And of course, although Bobby had told him he looks good in his bed, he finds Donghyuk on the same bed later that night. 

  
///////

  
"Jiwon, I'm so sick of seeing you with Donghyuk." he says one time. While he waits for Bobby to finally pick a tie that he wants. 

It didn't bother him at first that much. But whenever he sees them making out at every part of the campus, he wants to throw up. Bobby disgusts him. 

Bobby purses his lips and looks up at him. "Okay." he says before running his thumb on the silk blue tie that matches the shirt of their uniform.

"Okay, what?" 

"I'll stop seeing him." he says casually. 

That's what he's been doing lately. Fooling around. Hanbin doesn't like it. He wants Bobby to be serious, for once. Wants him to really love someone. Wants someone to really love Bobby.

"Did you really like him?" he asks. He gets up to help Bobby fix the tie. 

Bobby lets him do the work, holding his hand up like he was surrendering as he smiles. "You know who I like." 

Hanbin smoothens the fabric of Bobby's uniform, he meets his eyes. "And who is that?"

"You."

He sounds so serious. It was just one word. Still, Hanbin refuses to believe that.

  
///////

  
Hanbin was furious. He was seething. 

Donghyuk had slapped Bobby in front of everyone. Well, not literally everyone but there were enough people who saw and news travel fast. 

Not fast enough for Hanbin to be there though. He wants to get back. Wants to slap Donghyuk too. He knows it was wrong. Wrong to defend Bobby in a situation like this. Wrong for Bobby to play with someone's feelings. A part of him considers that Bobby deserves it. 

But nobody gets to slap Bobby just like that. His own mother doesn't even lay a single finger on him. The last time Bobby was really hurt was years ago. Hanbin doesn't want to relive the trauma. 

He calls Bobby's phone. There was no answer.

"Bin, he's at the parking lot." says Yunhyeong.

He doesn't waste any time.

He held his breath when he saw him. He was fine. He breathes. 

"You deserve it." Hanbin says, walking towards him, he leans on the car in front of Bobby's so that they're face to face. 

"I did." Bobby acknowledges. "It still hurt like a bitch though." he chuckles.

"What hurt? Your heart?" he raises an eyebrow.

"Yeah. My heart hurts." Bobby says.

Hanbin feels something at the pit of his stomach. Sick. Like he wants to throw up again. Bobby must've truly liked Donghyuk. His chest aches.

"'Cause you're here but you're not kissing my wounded cheek." Bobby continues, laughing when Hanbin rolls his eyes.

Suddenly, everything was light. Hanbin doesn't feel sick anymore. What a shame. He didn't like feeling better. 

  
///////

  
He spots Bobby's Porsche parked outside his house. When he went downstairs to eat, Bobby was already seated comfortably on the couch, smiling at him while he browsed through the magazines on the small table in front.

He ignores him and goes directly to the kitchen to find his Mom. He kisses her cheek. She smiles with her eyes as he does. 

"Eat fast. Don't make Jiwon wait too long." and she leaves. 

Bobby follows him to the dining table, sitting on the chair across him. 

"Have you eaten?" he asks. Bobby nods.

"Pestering me today because you don't have anyone to fool with?" he smirks at him. He knows Bobby too well. 

Bobby just shrugs, toying with the fruits in the center of the table and finally taking a bite on the apple in his hand. "Gotta eat lots of fruits." 

Hanbin squints his eyes, he asks, "And why is that?"

"So my cum would taste sweet." 

Hanbin chokes. Bobby pushes the glass of water into his hand while laughing his ass off. "You're insufferable." he says after recovering.

  
Bobby stays beside him while they walk. Sometimes he would brush his fingers on his, even tries to hold his hand and he tells him to knock it off. Bobby chuckles lightly, putting his hands in the pockets of his slacks. 

He always looked good in their uniforms. Hanbin had thought of it since the first time Bobby tried it on. Their uniform in highschool was different than it was in college. They were at a much more expensive private school. 

Bobby looks good in blue. Any shade of blue. It brings out his dark brown eyes. Hanbin had tried the uniform way before. He didn't like it on him. Bobby pouted when he said that. He wanted to see Hanbin try it on too. How they would look like together. 

Bobby didn't see him wearing the uniform until it was their first day in college, a year ago. He remembered what he said that day. 

"Nice tie." 

But he didn't like it. He still smiled though, and even wider when Bobby told him, "You look gorgeous, Kim Hanbin." 

He loves being complimented. Especially when the amount of effort he puts to keep his face glowing, to stay fit, is considered. He knows he's handsome—gorgeous or whatever degree of beauty it was. The abundance of love letters in his locker and Valentine's date proposals he had received in highschool and until now were proof of that. He wouldn't admit it out loud though. But he knows it full well. So, he loves it when other people do.

Bobby had always been handsome. Except maybe when they were 12 and he still wore those ugly square-framed glasses with leopard prints and an absurd colored snapback. 

He was arguably the most good-looking student in their university, if it excludes him. It was according to his friend, Song Yunhyeong. For Hanbin, the most good-looking was Jung Jaewon.

He liked being with Bobby. Having to stand next to him, and talk to him casually. He liked it because it gave him power. Because his social status was at its peak whenever he's with Bobby. And he loved attention. 

They went to see the ranking list on the bulletin board. Several students congratulated him on his way so he figured he was on top of that list again. It was indeed the case. He smiles proudly and looks for Bobby's name. 

5\. Kim Jiwon

He feels Bobby's chest on his back, his lips ghosting on his ear. "How do you do it?" Bobby whispers.

Hanbin smirks, he doesn't turn around to face Bobby. He just searches for his other friends' names. "Just know that you couldn't ever top me, Jiwon-ah."

"I'm pretty sure I _would_ top you, Hanbin-ah. And I know you'd love to be underneath me." 

Hanbin thinks his name rolled off Bobby's tongue nicely.

  
///////

  
A free Bobby wasn't a very nice Bobby. At least for Hanbin.

Since the guy hadn't been fooling around lately, he'd been tailing him. Hanbin thought it would be nice for once to be alone. But then when Bobby had finally left him by himself (not to his own accord though, Bobby had football practice), Hanbin found his way again to him. 

He sits on one of the bleachers, watching Bobby play. 

Hanbin was never sporty. Didn't like sports. Never liked watching it either. When he was young, his father tried to teach him how to properly score a goal, or at least kick it without his shoes flying off. Hanbin never succeeded. He didn't try hard enough. 

When he was conditioned to be friends with Bobby, he just watched the latter play with the other guys in their neighborhood, which seemed to be the only time Bobby liked to be with Junhoe. 

He remembered bringing towels and a water bottle for Junhoe, to cheer on him. After the first leg was done, Bobby had come up to him, grabbed the towels on his hand to wipe his face and chugged the water down his throat until the bottle was empty. He threw it in the trash can and never looked back. It was supposed to be for Junhoe. Hanbin didn't complain.

  
"I probably won't bring you home later." Bobby blurts, fresh out of the shower room with clean clothes and wet hair. Hanbin waited for him outside.

He stops walking. "But I still need to buy this book I told you. You said you'd come with me."

He didn't want to make a fuss. In fact, he can buy the book by himself. He can call their driver for the Benz to pick him up and go to the bookstore. It was that Bobby looked suspicious. He was hiding something.

"Ugh, this sucks. Fine, I would come with you first." 

"No, do what you need to do." 

Bobby's eyes lit up. "Really?"

"Yeah. I can buy the book by myself." He tries to sound not too passive. 

Then Bobby nods. He doesn't know why he was disappointed. 

  
///////

  
It's been three days since he had not seen Bobby. Well, he did see him in the corridors when Bobby greeted him this morning but it wasn't enough. He hadn't _seen_ seen him. 

They used to go home together and they hadn't done that in days. Bobby also didn't fetch him every morning like he always did. 

Hanbin wants to act like it doesn't matter. Especially when he saw Bobby hand in hand with another guy, he kisses his cheek before he lets him in his car. Bobby saw him too. He walks towards him.

"Thought you had a business meeting." he greets.

Bobby glances at the guy in the passenger's seat and then back at him. "Yeah, I just got back." 

Hanbin raises an eyebrow, he eyes him carefully. "I need a ride." 

There were no questions asked. Bobby just opens the door for him.

He didn't like the atmosphere inside. The guy Bobby was with stares at him, confused, he smiles as a greeting and Hanbin smiles back. 

He used to always sit in front and now he's at the back.

"Jiwon, who's your friend?" the guy asks.

That made him stiff. _Bobby_ was a nickname. Everybody—except for family—uses it to call him. And the name _Jiwon_, well, Hanbin had claimed that. He's the only one close enough outside the family for it. He's the only one allowed. To hear a stranger say it, to know Bobby had let him... it didn't seem so special. 

It was low of him to think he owns _Jiwon_. 

"Hanbin." Bobby looks back at him and smiles, "Bin, this is Jinhwan." he nods.

So he's what Bobby's been doing. 

"I need to go to the coffee shop." he looks outside the window.

Bobby stares at him from the mirror. "I'll take Jinhwan home first, okay?" 

"I'm hungry." he pouts, and sure he didn't have to but it looks like Bobby needed persuasion. He used to be a priority. 

"Yeah, we'll eat after." 

He rolls his eyes and slumps back to his seat. 

"Ji, we can go to the coffee shop." Jinhwan says, his hand rests on Bobby's thigh. 

Suddenly, he didn't want to go. Bobby should know he hates being with new people, especially those he fools around with. If Bobby agrees, he would jump outside his car and walk home.

"Nah, you hate coffees. I'll take you home." he looks back at Hanbin. "Bin, you wait." 

Hanbin scoffs, loud enough for Jinhwan to hear, and crosses his arms. He hates waiting.

Once Bobby had dropped Jinhwan off, he insisted Hanbin to sit in front. He resisted at first but complied, still sulking.

"Now, we go to the coffee shop." Bobby says chirpily.

"Take me home instead." Hanbin looks through the window. He feels Bobby's hand on his thigh and he swats it.

"I thought you were hungry." 

"Well, I was, but you decided to choose Jinhwan over me so now I'm not." 

It was confusing for Bobby. Why Hanbin was acting like this. He thought Hanbin would be happy he wasn't being a pain in his ass for once. Now, seeing Hanbin like this, he doesn't know where to stand.

"I didn't choose Jinhwan. He just needed to go home." he explains.

"Where did you meet him?" 

"Last week, at the bar." 

A week. Bobby decided to hide it from him for a week. He feels betrayed. 

"Can't you take a break? From fucking around?" he bursts.

Bobby's mouth fell. He didn't know where he was coming from. It wasn't an issue before. 

"I did it for you, Bin. So I wouldn't have to pester you—"

"Stop saying that. This was all you. I didn't ask you to fuck him. It's you, Jiwon. Don't blame me." 

"What's wrong? Hanbin, tell me. Because I'm really fucking confused right now." 

Something in Hanbin loses control. He didn't like that he didn't know Jinhwan. And even if he's only one background search away to know everything, he still hated how Bobby acted without him. He shouldn't be. Bobby has a mind of his own, he can make his own decisions. And he repeated that until he calmed down.

"Does he know you're filthy rich?" 

He hears Bobby curse silently. "Not everyone is after my money."

The drive to his house was a deafening silence. 

Bobby was right. He knows it. He was quick to judge everyone who interacts with Bobby without his knowledge.

Bobby wasn't his.

  
///////

  
They didn't talk for a few more days until the weekends. Hanbin decided to go to Bobby's house that night. He found him in their subterranean swimming pool, doing a few laps. 

He waits for Bobby to swim in his direction, or to stop so he can talk. When he didn't, he decides to call.

"Jiwon." 

Bobby pushes his hair back when he emerges out of water for air. He looks at Hanbin who sat by the edge of the pool, legs dangling in the water. He swims over to him. 

Hanbin wants to brush Bobby off when he caged him, both of his arms by his side. His face was dripping wet, smiling dopily.

"I'm sorry." he whispers. 

It could be that he missed him. He didn't want to apologize, didn't think he said something wrong. He was just being cautious. 

After an hour in the shower, he realized maybe Bobby had found love. Or that love had found him. Isn't that what he wanted?

"For what?" 

He feels Bobby's cold fingers on top of his hand, tapping at it, touching it.

"For not trusting Jinhwan?" 

The pool lights reflected on Bobby's face, he looked divine. He wasn't sure how apologizing works because in all honesty, he's not sorry and he still doesn't trust Jinhwan. 

But Bobby was smiling. He pulls him down and he shrieks as he gets wet and water splashed around. He doesn't know how to swim.

Bobby holds him so that he can float, laughing when he glares, his teeth chattering from the cold. "Don't let me go." 

"I won't." and he didn't. He holds his hand as they both swim to the more shallow water, where Hanbin's feet could reach the ground. 

When he was sure it was safe, he catches Bobby off guard and flicks water to his face. "I'm still in my pants, stupid." 

Bobby catches him too, wrapping his arms around his waist. He brushes the stray hairs off his forehead as water drips from it and plants a kiss on top. He doesn't stop there. He kisses Hanbin's eyebrows, his eyes when he closes it, he doesn't understand why Hanbin was letting him get away with this but he savored it, every time his lips touch Hanbin's face, something in his heart sparks. 

"Choose me." It was constricting, how Hanbin's eyes fluttered when he opened them, looking at him like he just said the most ridiculous thing. "I'd stop fucking around just...just be with me." 

"Why can't you just stop fucking around without me having to choose you?" Hanbin whispers, the same breathlessness he feels.

"And what of me? You'd be all over someone and I'd be pining over you? No." Bobby tightens his hold. 

"I don't like you, Jiwon." he couldn't look him in the eye. Bobby touches his chin, urging him to meet his gaze.

"Now that's a fucking lie." 

Their bodies were closer now. Almost no room for air. He didn't feel cold anymore. 

"You like me, Hanbin. You wouldn't be in here if you don't." 

He doesn't drink. Something about the taste of alcohol just doesn't sit right with his tongue. Right now he feels drunk. Bobby was kissing his neck. 

"Just say it. Say you want me." his lips move on the corner of his mouth, and he wants to push him. He wants to slap his face for making him think. Instead he closes his eyes, his arms on the back of Bobby's neck and he kisses him. 

But Bobby was quick to deny him. He pulls away, he looks at him, confused. "No. You don't get to kiss me. You know I'd be down on my knees for you so you don't get to seal it. And I wouldn't stand up, Bin. I'll answer to your every whims, I'll give you everything you need. I'd be damned if you kiss me right now." 

Hanbin doesn't care. 

He pulls him again closer and crashes his lips on his. It was sweet. The first move of Bobby's lips sent shivers down his spine. Soft, slow, serene. He knows for sure, once the sun is up he would be ashamed. When Bobby bit his bottom lip and he lets his tongue in, it didn't taste like regret.

  
///////

  
As a kid, he used to think first kisses weren't that special. What difference would it make from other kisses to follow? 

First kisses are sloppy, fast, experimental. They say you have to go with the flow of the moment, time the kiss with both of your heartbeats, close your eyes, and if luck is on your side, you could fight with tongues. 

Everything turned out to be complete bullshit. 

He remembers it clearly. How his first kiss went. It was senior prom. Bobby was supposed to take him. But he invited Junhoe instead. And the latter accepted. 

"Jiwon, are you mad?" it was obvious. Bobby didn't respond.

"There was a talk circulating the campus, you know." He trailed off, Bobby was listening. "You. Nayeon. Promposal?" 

Bobby looked at him, brows furrowed into one line. "The fuck is a promposal?" 

He sighed. "They said you invited Nayeon to prom, and she accepted. So I thought you weren't available." 

"Ditch Junhoe. For me." Bobby's anger must've dissipated, he put his hands in his sides. The feeling was warm and _convincing_. 

Hanbin didn't say anything. He just shook his head. That was enough for Bobby to let him go.

Their prom picture was framed in Hanbin's room. The four of them. Him and Junhoe, Bobby and Nayeon, all clad elegantly in red. Hanbin likes to stare at it sometimes, whenever he feels nostalgic. It wasn't the best moment of his life but the memories were unforgettable. 

Bobby and Nayeon flirted nonstop that night, deliberately letting him see what they're doing. He and Junhoe were just sitting, him awkwardly playing with the food on the table using a fork and Junhoe on his phone. 

"You wanna dance?" Junhoe asked, looking up at him from his phone. And Hanbin nodded. Finally.

Junhoe pulled him to the dancefloor, joining Bobby and Nayeon as their bodies collided. He closed his arms on the back of Junhoe's neck and Junhoe gripped on his waist. They looked at each other. 

With Junhoe, everything was likeable. Kind, considerate, handsome. It didn't help that he also likes boys though, because he never felt attracted to him. 

But when Junhoe leaned in for a kiss, he accepted. So that was how his first kiss went down. Sure, he wasn't supposed to know the difference between a bad and a good kiss. He was inexperienced, and he got no one to compare it with. 

Their lips were touching, it was just that. Hanbin knows it shouldn't be. He watched too many movies to know how a prom kiss should go. 

Junhoe seemed to notice that their lips have been meshed together for too long so he tried to move, Hanbin did too. And he kept thinking, who would kiss the upper lip or who would kiss the lower one. When is it acceptable for tongues to be in the picture? It was terrible. He figured it was also Junhoe's first. When they pulled apart out of embarrassment and frustration, they avoided each other's gaze.

The same night, he was ambushed by Bobby in the bathroom. Groped and pushed against the wall. 

"What was that?" Bobby gritted his teeth, his eyebrows met, forehead creased. 

"What was what?" 

"Why did you kiss Junhoe?" 

He was confused as to why Bobby was mad. Or why Bobby cared. He knows he hated Junhoe but why does it matter who he kissed?

"He kissed me first!" he answered.

"And that was your first kiss! I waited to claim it!" Bobby shouted back.

Hanbin's jaw dropped. He didn't know why he felt guilty. He thought Bobby was an idiot though, waiting to claim him but instead getting one upped by his cousin.

"Okay, be honest. Do you think of me as an object or an achievement, a prize to be won? Something like that?" he lifted an eyebrow.

Bobby scrubbed his face with his hand, feeling defeated. "No, I just think you deserve better than that." he saw the side of his lips lift and then Bobby was kissing him.

He felt conscious being a novice, still learning how to move his lips but Bobby's kisses were delicate, deftly guiding him into an entrancing rhythm he became familiar with after a few seconds. It was different. With Bobby's fingers on his chest, tracing nonsensical patterns, like he was exploring what makes him tick. A touch intended to make him open his mouth, let his warm tongue intrude, feel him push every button...make him moan.

Bobby was back to his bullshit. He couldn't help but roll his eyes when he saw him curled close together with a girl on the bleachers after their friendlies match. 

They didn't talk much after their kiss in the pool, at least Hanbin didn't. Bobby exhaled, "What was that?" but Hanbin refused to answer and practically avoided him, left him by himself in the pool and went home still soaking wet. He was thankful he didn't catch a cold.

Hanbin walks up to them, arms crossed. "Jiwon." he calls. Bobby raises his head to look up at him, vividly smiling. Hanbin thinks Bobby's purposely doing this to annoy him. 

"Hey, Hanbin." he says, casually, snaking his arm on the girl's waist. Hanbin stares at it and then proceeds to roll his eyes, again.

"Junhoe invited me to his birthday. I'm gonna buy a gift later. Are you coming with me?" 

For a moment, he thought he saw Bobby's jaw clenched, his arm disappearing on her waist as if losing interest. 

"You don't need to buy him a gift, you know." he says.

"Are you serious right now?" 

This time, Bobby rolls his eyes. "Fine." he murmurs another word which Hanbin didn't catch.

He turns his heels around them and stomps away. 

  
Junhoe's house wasn't too far from Bobby's. A modern mansion, they say. The Koos were an integral part of the top news stations in Seoul. It was one of their family businesses, since Bobby's father manages the Kim Tech Industries with Hanbin's dad.

Junhoe claps as soon as he sees them, running towards Hanbin and kissing his cheek abruptly. "You came!" he says excitedly, nodding, too, at Bobby.

"Happy Birthday!" Hanbin greets, thrusting a paper bag containing his gift (a Haruki Murakami book) in Junhoe's hand. 

He kisses him again on the cheek in delight before leaving them by themselves and instructing where to find food. 

"Fix your face, Jiwon." his index finger touches Bobby's wrinkled forehead, flicking the crease.

Junhoe's guests were mostly their friends from high school, save from a few relatives. He doesn't go to the same school as them. 

Being the blacksheep, Junhoe didn't take up business. He went on to study Forestry, which was a venture a lot different from his supposed-to-be legacy. 

Nayeon comes up to them too, jumping from excitement. She hugs both of them, squealing and pinching Hanbin's cheeks. 

"Babe, long time no see!" she kisses Bobby's cheek, pressing her lips hardly as he giggles. "And Hanbin! Wow you guys are both glowing." she does the same to him.

Nayeon was one of their closest friends during high school. She was a model back then and he thinks she still is until now, remembering how he saw her in one of the magazines in Bobby's room. She also used to fool around with Bobby—they didn't make anything official—before she came out as a lesbian. 

They talked with her for a while. Catching up on things. Bobby excuses himself to get drinks. Hanbin nods and continues where he and Nayeon left off. 

Bobby comes back, nudging him with a can of soda and Nayeon with the same beer he was holding. Nayeon thanks him and smiles. Hanbin decides to drink up.

"Are you guys like together now?" 

Hanbin almost spits, he coughs and regains himself before shaking his head. 

"Oh right, I'm sorry. I just thought..." she laughs awkwardly. "Well, anyway, I'll see you guys around. I'm just gonna eat." she waves at them and leaves.

Bobby sits on the couch, he taps the space beside him for Hanbin to sit on. Before he could, Junhoe's arm was on his side. 

"Bin, I'm gonna introduce you to someone." Junhoe whispers to him.

"Knock it off, Junhoe." Bobby says, even if he didn't hear what Junhoe whispered.

Junhoe looks at him, smiling widely, mockingly. He was drunk. "Come on, man. It's just a friend." he pulls at Hanbin's wrist so he could follow him.

Hanbin doesn't protest, he turns back to look at Bobby, mouthing _I'll be back_, then lets Junhoe pull him.

It was a guy from his college. Jung Jaewon. He didn't know how he and Junhoe met or how they became friends. Junhoe was drunk and didn't explain much. He just left them together after he shook his hand. Jaewon, apparently, knew of him. 

"Well, you were always on top of your department's ranking list so I got curious." Jaewon says.

Hanbin nods, smiling politely and taking a sip of his Sprite which was now almost empty. 

"Also, aren't you Bobby's boyfriend? Or did you guys break up?" 

Hanbin thinks Jaewon was pretty, but his mouth runs too fast. He was too curious for his own good, some might say nosy, he doesn't like it. Or maybe he was just getting anxious, thinking about the look on Bobby's face before he left him. 

It was like his mind conjured Bobby to manifest in front of him, slinging his arms on his shoulder and kissing his cheek. A display of affection to show off. He tries not to scoff.

"Knew it." he hears Jaewon murmurs. 

"Let me excuse him for a sec, if that's okay." Bobby says, and he walks away with Hanbin without waiting for Jaewon to answer.

Hanbin removes Bobby's heavy arm on his shoulder. "I'm gonna go to the bathroom." 

He closes the door and stares at himself in the mirror, turning on the faucet and washing off the redness in his face. 

It wasn't long before the door opens again. He looks at Bobby through the mirror, the latter not breaking eye contact as he closes and locks the door. He walks towards him, close enough to feel his figure looming over him, not close enough to feel his heartbeat. 

Bobby presses his chest on Hanbin's back, his hands on top of Hanbin's, gripping on the sink. He rests his chin on Hanbin's shoulder. 

"We shouldn't have gone here." Bobby whispers, catching his lobe between his lips, nibbling on it. He licks Hanbin's neck once.

Hanbin feels his eyes getting heavy, he closes it. "Don't be silly. It's our friend's birthday. It's your cousin's birthday." 

Bobby unbuttons his uniform one by one, he ditched his coat in his car earlier so he doesn't feel hot. Right now, it was the exact opposite. 

Bobby's fingers moved fast, like he was in a hurry. They were in the common bathroom, after all.

He lets it fall off Hanbin's shoulder, planting wet kisses on the soft skin, his hand rests on Hanbin's stomach, the other caressing his chest. 

"I don't care about him." Bobby says before continuing to dip his lips on the lines of Hanbin's back. He tongues his shoulder blades, his nape, which makes Hanbin shiver. When Bobby flicks his nipple with his fingers, he releases a soft moan. 

"Tell me you want this." his kisses went down to Hanbin's spine, reveling on the latter's shudder and silent whimpers. He circles his fingers on his nipple, loving the way Hanbin's mouth opens, and then closes again as he bites on his lip, like he was restraining himself. "Say you want me doing this to you." 

He opens the fly of his slacks easily, rubbing Hanbin's half-hard cock with his palm through his boxers. His lips went further up, now resting on Hanbin's neck. 

"Jiwon..." 

Bobby mouths on his skin, fingers parting the slit of his boxers and freeing his cock. Bobby's hand was rough, calloused and big, but it felt perfect when it closes in on his dick. He bit his lips harshly. 

"I'm losing myself, Bin. You're making me lose myself." he sucks on his neck, careful not to leave marks. He did leave a few on Hanbin's shoulder though, and another faint one on his back. He gathers the generous precome on the tip of Hanbin's dick and patiently spreads it on his length for ease. 

He strokes him slowly. Everytime he goes up, he would bite lightly on the crook of Hanbin's shoulder, and everytime he goes down, Hanbin would hiss. 

"Stop..." Hanbin trails off.

For a minute there, Bobby thought Hanbin wanted him to stop, but when Hanbin thrusts up into his hand he figured he wasn't done talking yet.

"Hmm?" he hums on his shoulder, the vibration making Hanbin's stomach flip.

"Stop fooling around." Hanbin manages to say, leaning his head down Bobby's shoulder, lips touching Bobby's jaw.

Bobby makes a mistake to look in the mirror and stare at their reflections, at Hanbin, all in his half-naked glory, with patches of red marks on his shoulder, nipples hard, and lips mouthing on his jaw. He was thankful it didn't catch his hand fisted on Hanbin's dick. It would drive him crazy. 

"Then own me." he twists his hand on his dick, thumbs the slit, and when he feels him shuddering and almost close, he rolls his palm on head. 

Hanbin releases a sob on his neck, and fuck, it was beautiful. He wonders how many times he could make Hanbin sound like that. 

"You're mine, Jiwon." Hanbin's orgasm was hard, he held onto Bobby's shoulder so he wouldn't fall, chanting more _hmmm_s and _Jiwoooon_s. 

Hanbin closes his eyes and tries to breathe normally. It didn't help that he could feel Bobby's heartbeat, which was just as fast as his. Bobby's hot breath soon followed, leaning down his head in his ear to whisper. "That's right, baby, I'm yours." 

Hanbin doesn't realize how much control he has over Bobby.

  
///////

  
He wasn't a complete virgin. But he had only tried fooling around twice. One where he topped, and one where he bottomed. After that, he figured he didn't like sex that much. Getting fucked wasn't in his priority list. 

Thinking about what happened last night made his skin itch. His face heating with embarrassment whenever he remembers coming on Bobby's hand. It should be awkward between them but as usual, Bobby fetched him this morning, with an unnatural glow in his face, his skin dewy and with a delighted smile. 

Inside the car, Bobby's smile didn't waver that it started to annoy him.

"Stop smiling." he says, fixing his hair on the rear-view mirror.

Bobby chuckles, clicking his tongue twice before stepping on the gas. "Stop raining on my parade. I'm just happy." 

  
A whole day since he hasn't seen Bobby with someone. It wasn't surprising though, Bobby takes rest. But something in him was screaming that Bobby finally dropped everyone for him after the whole _you're mine, Jiwon_ ordeal. 

He keeps on replaying it on his head, not wanting to believe he would actually say that. Whatever happened to him wanting Bobby to find love? Maybe deep in his heart, he never wished for it to happen. 

He was already there. What more could Bobby seek for?

  
"Got three points higher than you on the recent quiz. Wait, what's that I hear?" Bobby places his hand behind his ear as if to hear better. "Sounds like your top 1 streak shaking in fear." he says mockingly.

Bobby sat across him and Yunhyeong during lunch. The latter making up an excuse to leave them together and succeeding with a smirk when Hanbin didn't budge. 

"You wish." was all he could muster. 

He observes Bobby, brushing his soft hair with his fingers. Grinning when a brilliant idea crosses his mind, he taps on the table to get his attention. 

"Next quiz if I get a score higher than you, and I will for sure, you'll dye your hair purple." he licks his lip in satisfaction when Bobby narrows his eyes, mouth open to protest. 

"No fucking way."

If there is one thing Bobby takes care of diligently other than his ego, it would be his hair. He has all the right to though, otherwise it would make him less appealing. (Which, however, wasn't the case when Bobby permed his hair when he lost a bet during the World Cup)

Hanbin pouts. "Pussy." 

Bobby scoffs, mind racing to think of something to negotiate. "And what if I score higher than you? What will you do for me in return?" 

Hanbin shrugs. He wasn't really scared of losing because he knows he can always beat Bobby. "Whatever you want." 

"I think I'm gonna give you a gift." Bobby leans into him and tilts his chin. 

"Sounds more like a reward than a punishment." he says while staring at Bobby's plump lips.

"It's something you would like..." Bobby gives him a quick kiss. "Very much." he whispers against his lips. 

When Bobby pulls away, he embarrasses himself by extending his lips more and Bobby beams. 

"Later." he gathers his things and winks at him before he leaves.

Hanbin slumps back on his chair, biting his lip and crossing his arms. He couldn't help but think about what gift Bobby would give him. For a fleeting moment, he wanted to purposely lose. Fuck purple-haired Bobby.

Or, like literally.

He scrubs his face with his hand. Yunhyeong comes back.

"Got a stick up your ass?" 

He ignores him.

  
///////

  
In the moments that passed watching the first half of the friendlies with their department and the engineering society, trying to understand how football works, Hanbin thought Bobby was incredibly good. 

With the help of a little eavesdropping from one of the avid football fans in front him, he heard that Bobby had an amazing control of the ball, an accurate pass, and he was a really good forward. Nothing that he had caught with his own eyes but he was impressed nonetheless. 

Jaewon smiles as he sits beside him, nodding at him briefly and focusing his eyes on the field. 

"Seems like you guys are winning." Jaewon muses.

"I have absolutely no idea what's happening but I guess?" he shrugs, which makes Jaewon chuckle. 

"Bobby's really good, 'no?" he nods, following Bobby's movements with his eyes. 

Through the entirety of the second half, Jaewon decided to commentate what's happening in the field, explaining to him some football jargons he wasn't familiar with—which was everything. 

Jaewon was from the engineering society, but he seemed to be leaning more on the business department. 

When Bobby manages to score another goal, they both shout. 

"That's a hat-trick!" Jaewon yells at him over the loud cheers, delighted and smiling widely like a proud boyfriend. 

"It is?" Hanbin mirrors his expression. "What's a hat-trick?" 

It was all he could hear at that moment. _Bobby scored a hat-trick. Bobby was the ace. Bobby was phenomenal._ He smiles adoringly, despite not knowing what a hat-trick meant.

When the cheers died down and the second leg was almost done, Jaewon explained to him how Bobby managed to score three goals in a row, and without even having to use the penalty kick. It was a big deal because not everyone can manage to squeeze in three goals in 96 minutes with 21 players surrounding you. 

Their department wins, of course, as expected. Bobby was deemed the Man of the Match. He took photos with everyone, including the whole cheerleading squad. 

Hanbin observes them from afar. One cheerleader comes close to Bobby and kisses his cheek as a congratulatory remark, Bobby seems taken aback though but he smiles and nods at her. 

He patiently waits for him to finish being the superstar that he is, constantly checking the time on his watch and yawning. 

He doesn't realize Bobby never noticed him until his eyes widen at the realization that Hanbin was there. Bobby immediately releases himself from the sea of people crowding him and goes towards his direction.

"Watching my game like a true boyfriend?" Bobby wiggles his eyebrow, wiping the sweat off his face with the band on his wrist, which was stupid because it was too small to seep through everything. 

"What do you mean? I just passed by." he says innocently. 

Bobby purses his lips in amusement, refusing to believe him. "I'm gonna go take a shower. Wait for me a little bit more?" 

"Ugh, make it fast. My knees are killing me." 

"Okay, grandpa." he gives him a peck on the forehead before sprinting to the shower room.

Bobby pauses once they were both inside the car, Hanbin looks at him warily, not knowing whether to ask what's wrong or avoid his eyes altogether and focus on the road. 

"Where should we go?" Bobby asks. "I'm sure you didn't wait for me that long just to take you home." He grins.

"First of all, I didn't wait for you." Well, he did and he didn't know exactly why, he just found himself sitting on the bleachers when he became aware of the friendlies currently happening that time. He wouldn't admit that to Bobby. "And second, I don't wanna go home yet so wherever you take me is fine." 

"We got this victory party at Chanwoo's house, it's all planned out because we were sure we'll win." he beams at him proudly. "Should we go there?" 

"Yeah, sure, whatever." 

  
///////

  
Chanwoo was the football team's goalkeeper. And quite frankly, Bobby's closest university friend, aside from Hanbin. His house was always the location of college parties since he was a freshman and he indeed made a good host of himself.

As soon as Bobby stepped inside the house, he was bombarded by a handful of congratulations, the team carried him off the ground like a trophy and Bobby's eyes disappeared from smiling, thanking them and demanding to be let back down. 

His hand finds Hanbin's waist as soon as he was on the ground, still overjoyed from the support he was getting. 

"What a superstar. Can I get your autograph?" Hanbin mocks.

"Oh, don't be jealous. You still have all of my attention." he presses his fingers firmly on Hanbin's waist and leans down to whisper. "Autograph later, using my tongue, on your skin."

It was fun to just watch the students in his university get wasted. Like he said, he doesn't drink (except when it's necessary, in which the chances of it being inevitable was slim to none). He preferred being on the sober end of the line while the people he sees almost everyday make a fool of themselves. 

Bobby was one of them, having gone to the keg stand twice and had been taking up jell-o shots since they found a tray on the fridge. 

Hanbin was content with eating pizzas on the table and drinking sodas. He didn't bother much with keeping an eye on Bobby. He knows he'll come back.

Soon enough, Bobby did. Eyes heavy from drinking too much and almost stumbling into him. He comes up to him, ridiculously close, lips on his ears and arms caging him. "Wanna go home." he murmurs.

He doesn't say a word, he just rolls his eyes and carries him on his shoulders, bidding his goodbye to Chanwoo before leaving. 

Bobby flops on the passenger seat, leaning his head back to the head rest, eyes closed tightly. Hanbin fumbles on the pocket of Bobby's jeans trying to find the keys to his car. 

"Jiwon, where are the keys?" he asks after a few seconds of fruitless fumbling. 

Bobby's lips lift to the side, his eyes still deeply shut as he mumbles. "Here's the kiss." he puckers his lips. 

"Wow, you're so annoying." He retrieves the keys in the back-pocket of Bobby's jeans, lifting his butt slightly before closing the door and seating himself to drive. 

He looks at Bobby once, completely passed out. "Why'd you even drink so much? Now I have to drive." he hates driving.

Through the course of their friendship/non-friendship, Bobby had never been drunk to the point of throwing up. It was always him dragging Bobby out of the club to keep him from throwing a fight and him just watching Bobby dry hump with literally anyone. Nevertheless, Bobby just blacks out after that. So he wonders, why now?

He was trying to tuck Bobby to bed, fixing the way he positions himself in his sleep (because, Jimi Hendrix) and then out of the blue, like lightning struck him, Bobby sat up and barfed. Most of it was on the bed sheet though, thank god, and only a whisk on his shirt and pants.

Bobby was completely awake after that, Hanbin thought he wouldn't immediately go back to being a burden, and sleep but the former was laughing drowsily, wiping the vomit off his mouth with the back of his hand. 

"Go take a shower and brush your teeth, since you're awake. I'll call the helper to clean your sheets." he points to the bathroom.

Bobby pouts, blinking slowly and dropping his body back to the bed. "And if I trip, crack my head open, and die while talking a shower by myself?" 

"Don't be overdramatic. You stink" Hanbin says, talking to the helper over the phone while Bobby reluctantly goes to the bathroom. 

Once the door closes, Hanbin goes to Bobby's walk-in closet to pick out clothes for the both of them, he stinks too. 

He contemplates on whether or not to join Bobby—it wasn't their first time showering together—or to wait for the latter to finish and his turn but he opts for the first choice, thinking about the stupid thing Bobby said ealier. 

Bobby was down to his boxers. Hanbin saw him through the steam of the glass door separating the shower room from the rest. 

He'd seen Bobby naked before, never really paid attention that much, never wanted to. It was during his 18th birthday when they went skinny-dipping. Bobby was drunk and really, really flirty, but it wasn't with him. Some guy Bobby used to fool around with. 

He removes his barfed-up shirt and jeans and slid into the shower room with Bobby, a little nervous, for starters, Bobby had been open into getting it on with him. Before, he never really dared to. Bobby just annoyed him with all the things he does, and now Bobby annoys him with all the things he doesn't. 

"Wow." Bobby exclaims, like he had seen Hanbin's body for the first time. "You should be illegal." 

Bobby's body was much bigger than his, granted, an athlete and a gym buff. Hanbin worked out too, in his own little way. He jogged when he has time, and tagged along with Bobby and Chanwoo to the gym. 

"I know. People say they can't get enough of me." he says in sarcasm, turning on the shower and letting the water hit his stomach. Not for long though, Bobby pulls his arm so that he faces him. 

"Jiwon, we really need to shower right now." 

"Then we'll shower." 

Bobby leads them both to the wall, now wet and dripping with water, he passes through the shower quickly before Bobby was trapping him, the water hitting only Bobby's broad back as the latter plays with the elastic of his boxers. Bobby leans down to mouth on his neck, lazily, like tasting the water that made him soaked. 

"Hmmm, this is not showering." he closes his eyes, feeling the way Bobby's hot tongue lights something inside of him with every swirl. He opens them suddenly, gripping on Bobby's shoulder when he realizes the latter was in fact, writing his initials...using his tongue...on his skin. Just as he promised. 

He feels Bobby's smile when he moans again.

"Yours, always." he hears Bobby whispers, tracing the line of his jaw, and down to his neck like it was his refuge.

"Stop holding me accountable for the things I say when I'm horny." Hanbin retorts.

Bobby laughs, a hint of bitterness ringing at the end after he does. He peppers his jaw and cheeks with kisses.

"Not true. You like having control over me. That's why you always want me to stop fucking around, right?" Bobby gives him a chaste kiss, pulling away again to say something. "You want me all to yourself." 

They kiss like they invented it. Tongues chasing, making love without love. Bobby caresses his waist as their tongues fight. He grasps on his hair, tighter when Bobby nibbles on his lower lip. He moves his head to the side, giving him access again to his neck, panting as Bobby sucks on it. 

Hanbin props up his knee to rub it against Bobby's hardness, the latter's moan against his skin sending electricities through his body. His hands manage to hold the elastic of Bobby's boxers, pulling it down harshly until it falls on the wet floor. Bobby steps outside it, kicking it away as he grazes his teeth on Hanbin's shoulder. 

Hanbin closes his hand on Bobby's cock, the same time he closes his eyes when he feels Bobby's fingers teasing on his ass. Before Bobby could insert one, he had changed their position. With Bobby now against the wall, shocked and breathing heavily, and him getting soaked by the water hitting his back. 

"Why'd you still do it?" he says, twisting his grip on Bobby's cock while mouthing on his chest. His eyes look up at Bobby while he does things to him. Bobby curses, trying to register what he just asked.

"What?"

Hanbin bites on Bobby's nipple, licking it thoroughly as an apology when Bobby groans. He continues stroking his cock. "Why do you still fool around when you know I want you all to myself?" 

"Because—fuck—I like it when you care." Bobby looks down at him, losing his mind whenever Hanbin drags his tongue along the cracks of muscles on his stomach. "I'm only doing it to get you heated, Bin. I don't really care about any of them." he breathes.

"Fuck that." Hanbin finds himself kneeling in front of Bobby, licking his cock from base to tip, sucking on the head and tasting him. 

Hanbin worries too much. Everyday, at school, at home, anywhere. Right now, he lets go of all the things that bother him. Whether he would do good in pleasing Bobby or not—he'd only sucked a dick once and he did terrible, it was his first time—it doesn't matter.

When he swirls his tongue on the tip of his dick and he looks up at Bobby staring down at him like he couldn't believe Hanbin was on his knees, lips parted and hissing when he licks again, he lets go of everything altogether. 

It's _just_ Bobby. It's _just_ Kim Jiwon.

He licks his shaft once more before taking it in, hollowing his cheeks and bobbing his head up and down, his hand still closed on the base. Bobby carded his fingers through his hair, encouraging him to go faster. He mutters a series of curses when Hanbin does as he's told, releasing his cock from his grip and taking him all in.

"Bin...God, fuck." Bobby traces the hollow of his cheek with his thumb, loving the way Hanbin closes his eyes and mewls, still with a mouthful of his dick. He chews on his lower lip relentlessly, not wanting to come early just how he gets undone seeing Hanbin's pretty mouth on him. 

Hanbin releases him, and continues by just giving his dick sultry kisses. He ignores it and suckles on Bobby's inner thigh, his cock pressing on his cheek while he does. Bobby moans.

"Jiwon..." he calls, hesitantly, but gaining confidence when he sees how satisfied Bobby looks, chest heaving and mouth swollen red. 

"Hanbin..." 

"Use me." he sends him a gaze so inexplicably fiery, waves of arousal coursing through his body. He opens his mouth as an invitation, parting them slowly, sticking out his tongue just a little.

And Bobby doesn't even think twice. He grabs on Hanbin's hair, yanking it down to start fucking his mouth. His thrusts were precise, hitting the back of Hanbin's throat and retreating only to a minimal amount before fucking again. 

Hanbin swallows around him, tears forming on the side of his eyes, saliva running down his chin. 

What has Bobby done to him? As far as he knows, he didn't like any of this. Yet everytime Bobby thrusts into his mouth, his tongue dragging on the underside of his dick as he tastes a bit of come, everytime he hears even just a little of Bobby's wanton moans of wanting, he finds himself giving in. Letting him come in jerky rhythms down his throat, his fingers grasping on his unruly hair, groaning incredulously loud. And God was Bobby _sweet_. 

Bobby lets himself fall on the wet tiles on the ground to level with Hanbin, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, avoiding his gaze. He catches Hanbin's chin and tilts it in his direction, kissing him softly, passionately, he whispers a small _thank you_, and goes on to plant a long-lasting kiss on his forehead. 

They finally take a shower. 

  
///////

  
The next day was the dreaded quiz. He and Bobby had Business Maths together, the only subject they share. And the quiz was happening right now.

Hanbin woke up earlier that day with a splitting headache, and he didn't know why because he didn't even drink. Besides that, his knees also hurt (he knows why), and his back (from the cold, they stayed in the shower with the water running for too long). Bobby, on the other hand, was unfairly fine and chirpy, smiling from ear to ear and kissing his cheek the minute he opened his eyes. 

He didn't like that Bobby wasn't suffering just as he was. 

Anyway, it was a surprise quiz. He didn't mind it though, he knew all the answers already. One of his skills—aside from flower arrangement and apparently deepthroating—was maths, which was the one thing Bobby admitted he was envious of. 

After checking if he got the answers right, he puts down his pen carefully and looks at Bobby's paper. They were seated beside each other, significantly distant to avoid cheating, but his eyes were as clear as day. Bobby got one answer wrong. 

Of course, this only means one thing. Bobby lost their bet. He gets to see Bobby say goodbye to his precious hair and dye it purple.

And sure, as good as winning sounds, Hanbin thinks there's nothing wrong with losing too. If he were to be perfectly honest, he likes Bobby's hair as it is, and whatever changes he will do, he's sure he'll like it too. To add into that, he was more curious as to what Bobby would give him if he ever loses. 

He bites on the tip of his pen pensively. His dilemma roaming on top of his head.

Bobby puts his pen down smugly, proud that he was—as he thinks—the first one to finish. His hands rest on the back of his head, tapping his foot on the floor as if waiting for Hanbin's decision.

He hopes for all of this to be worth it, deliberately changing two of his answers into the wrong one. He feels his spine tingling with excitement. Bobby shouldn't disappoint. 

///////

Hanbin was a known grade conscious. Even in high school. He was the class valedictorian, and his achievements were undeniably too many to mention.

Bobby was competitive, but with Hanbin, he had managed to lose on several occasions. Hanbin only tries betting with Bobby when he knows he's gonna win, be it a basketball match they both became invested in or how many cookies they can fit inside their mouths. 

Losing was a different taste sitting on Hanbin's tongue.

The results were out after a few hours and as expected, Bobby got one wrong. Hanbin got two, thanks to his deliberate fabrication.

He was inside Bobby's car, fiddling with the amount of unnecessary things on the dashboard, waiting for Bobby to finish talking with Chanwoo outside.

Once Bobby was inside too, he instructed him to fasten his seatbelt. He hears him exhale a disappointed sigh. Must be something he talked about with Chanwoo.

"You cheated today." Hanbin's mouth falls agape, not knowing what to say. 

"I saw you look at my paper from my peripheral vision, Bin. You changed your answers afterwards." 

Still, he doesn't talk. Embarrassed that Bobby had caught him. Wondering if he can waive the bet and get it over with.

"I don't mind though." He turns his head to stare at Bobby, the familiar smugness of his voice coming back, he was smiling. "Still got you a gift whether I lose or not." Bobby nods at the glove compartment, demanding Hanbin to open it and see what's inside.

Hanbin gulps nervously, still not recovering on how Bobby caught him. He forgot Bobby's eyes were like two little surveillance cameras. He opens the compartment with shaky hands, noting that there was a beautiful black box inside, wrapped in a silky yellow ribbon. 

"Go on, open it." Bobby indulges.

And Hanbin obliges. Slowly untying the ribbon and setting it aside. Opening the box and a single, silent, gasp escaping his lips. He feels heat creeping in his face, turning into a slight shade of red. He covers the box again, putting it carefully on the dashboard.

He averts his eyes from Bobby, looking through the window outside.

Bobby used something against him.

Something he thought the latter had forgotten since. 

"You can't use it yet though. Bad boys don't get to have gifts." Bobby laughs mockingly.

Hanbin closes his fist in contempt. Bobby shouldn't have done that. He shouldn't have.

But he wants to take a look at his gift again, the manifestation of his fantasy. One thing he told Bobby, and his friends about when they were drunk, when he still used to drink. He wanted to run his fingers on it. He wanted to wear it. It was his gift, anyway.

He gathers the courage to speak, finally facing Bobby.

"Why not?" he plasters a smirk in false confidence. "Are you afraid something might happen? That your patience might collapse if you ever saw me inside your house, on your bed, wearing your gift, calling you out, Jiwon..." he closes his eyes, his name rolling off his tongue in a moan.

Bobby had a hungry look on his face. Something carnal. Like he wanted to devour him right there and then. 

"Damn straight, I am." he growls.

Hanbin sighs, almost purrs when he feels Bobby's grip on his thigh.

"You're gonna wear that school uniform for me, Bin. And fuck I would make you come in it. Get it all soiled up." Bobby slumps back in his seat, leaning down on the headrest, eyes closed. "You think I forgot about that little fantasy of yours? I think about it everyday." he looks at him with such sultriness. He'd been dying to say this. 

"I hope you didn't forget about mine, though. Me coming on your clothes, making them my cumrag and slapping your face with my dick like the cockslut that you are? God." 

Hanbin didn't forget. But he was shocked to know the fantasy was about him. Bobby wasn't very specific that time, or he was but Hanbin was just too drunk to piece two and two together. 

He gets the box again and puts it on his lap, removing the cover and running his fingers on the material. He bites his lip in awe. He couldn't believe he still wants it. He was just joking before.

The gift was a school uniform. Not just any though, it's _their_ uniform. But for _girls_. 

He rubs his thumb on the navy blue plaid skirt, tracing the pleats with his index. The blouse was also soft to touch, white with blue plaid linings on the sleeves and collar, complete with a cute blue bow tie.

"Let me have it." he says in a hushed tone.

Bobby wasn't going to disagree at first, but he thought of Hanbin wearing it for other guys so he shakes his head. 

"Jiwon, I cheated specifically for this. It should be mine." he reasons.

"It's for me." Bobby says, which made him confused.

"What?"

"You only wear it for me." he looks at him.

"Who else would I wear it for?" Hanbin looks at him back like he couldn't believe what Bobby was saying.

Bobby finally nods, a smile creeping in his face as he drives.

  
///////

  
Hanbin had a girlfriend once. An exchange student from Japan named Hayi. The girl never really piqued his interest before aside from thinking she was really pretty. They became friends easily and when they clicked, they decided to take their relationship much deeper. They parted after a year, when Hayi decided to drop out and follow the path she had laid down for herself.

"She looks just as good as before." Bobby stares at her through the magazine Hanbin is holding. 

Hanbin nods, flipping through it again after reading what Hayi said about her little high school experience. She became a famous soloist from a big agency. He reckons it was always her dream to be one.

Thinking about it, he never really loved Hayi the way one was meant to feel loved.

Platonic as it is, he never felt Hayi had loved him like that either.

They were just two close friends, who kissed and copulated, and somehow understood each other better together than they did by themselves.

Bobby never had a girlfriend. Never had a boyfriend either. As ridiculous as it seems. He liked being in a noncommitted relationship. One where he can leave easily whenever he wants. 

Hanbin never realized how and when Bobby started trying to woo him. He was just aware of his presence, as he was always by his side, and content that he can make Bobby do whatever he wants. 

He had thought about it. If Bobby were to ask something for him in return. But things get complicated whenever the thought eats him up and becomes constant. 

What he doesn't know is Bobby's contentment to just give, and give without expecting. And everytime Hanbin tries to give back, he's afraid he would yearn for more and drown.

"Got friendlies again with the EngSoc. They demanded a rematch. They think this shit is fucking basketball." Chanwoo snorts, finishing the last bite of his burger.

"Hanbin, you gotta be there and cheer for us, okay?" He adds.

"I know nothing about football, though. But for you, I'll be there." Hanbin winks.

Bobby chuckles lightly, and Chanwoo beams with pride. "It's fine. You can sit beside Jaewon again so he'll teach you what a hat-trick is." 

"What the hell?" 

Chanwoo laughs out loud, holding his stomach like Hanbin's reaction was the funniest thing he's seen in a long time. Hanbin didn't expect Chanwoo to know about that particular detail. 

"Jaewon did what?" Bobby asks.

"I got ears everywhere, baby boy. Especially if it involves the enemies." Chanwoo quotes _enemies_ in the air as their department had been feuding with the engineering society since they were freshmen.

Bobby looks at him accusingly, narrowing his eyes as if waiting for his explanation. 

"Well, Jaewon seems to be more interested in you than he is with me." Hanbin exclaims, and Chanwoo laughs again.

"Oh so that's why he's been asking me about Bobby lately." Chanwoo nudges Bobby's side with his shoulder and wiggles his eyebrows at him suggestively. "Probably wants to suck your dick." 

Bobby shrugs, grinning lop-sidedly. "Maybe I should try him." 

Hanbin kicks Bobby's shin lightly under the table, scrunching his face in dismay as the latter winces in exaggerated pain.

"You guys should have a threesome." Chanwoo suggests. 

They both look at him. Chanwoo stares at them back with eyes asking _what?_

"You're the only one allowed to have a threesome with us." Bobby jokes and he laughs when he saw Chanwoo blushed.

Victory.

  
///////

  
Their department, as expected, won again. With Bobby scoring two points—only one actually, the other was an assist—and their opponent scoring none. Jaewon sat beside him as predicted, explaining things again like what an offside trap meant, or how a corner kick is achieved.

Bobby had been sending him a few glances while in game, noticing how he was in fact, beside Jaewon and talking. He runs towards him immediately, while he was still seated on the bleachers, avoiding the sea of supporters flocking him after the game. 

Jaewon eyes them both with a knowing look. He pays no attention to him.

"Will take a shower first. We'll go to Chanwoo's for the party, that okay?" Hanbin agrees, a little conscious that Bobby was too close to his face right while he was with Jaewon.

Bobby turns his head slightly to face the man beside him. "You can come too, if you want." he grins.

"Oh, it's fine. I have better things to do." Jaewon smiles back, and Bobby nods slowly like he understood what better things Jaewon needed to do.

Chanwoo calls him so they can finally shower. Hanbin shoos him so he can go.

They both emerge out of the shower room laughing, with Chanwoo elbowing Bobby nonstop and Bobby hissing at him teasingly.

"Hey Bobby, you coming to Chanwoo's party?" a girl in a cheerleading uniform comes up to them, her hand stretched out to touch Bobby's arms. Hanbin raises an eyebrow.

"'Course, Chanwoo's not gonna start the party without me." Chanwoo clicks his tongue at that, agreeing.

"Well, see you then." her fingers hover down until her thumb rubs on the back of Bobby's palm, and then she leaves.

"Woah, is she the one responsible for the hickey on your thigh?" Chanwoo exclaims.

"Shut up." Bobby retorts, ears turning pink.

Hanbin bites the inside of his cheeks to prevent a smile. At least, he knows he's the one responsible for that.

  
///////

  
Bobby didn't drink much, true to his promise on their way. Chanwoo didn't like that Bobby wasn't as wasted as him, but from the slur of his voice and heavy-lidded eyes, he doesn't look like he's aware of it anyway.

He was left to take care of Chanwoo after the party, he puts him down carefully on his bed as the latter mumbles incoherently in his ears. Bobby was downstairs, making sure the guests won't make a fuss, politely asking them to leave as the owner of the house wasn't in such authority to do so. 

Hanbin was startled when Chanwoo suddenly sat up, bolting on the closet and retrieving something in which Hanbin needed to squint to see what it was.

Chanwoo positions himself beside him, hiccuping, and with a fuzzy, boyish smile. "This is my gift for you." he sniffles and puts the cold metal on Hanbin's palm.

Handcuffs...

Hanbin wasn't sure why, of all things, Chanwoo would give him something like this. Or more importantly, why Chanwoo even owns one.

He sniffles again, closing the palm of Hanbin's hand and rubbing it with both of his thumbs. "For taking care of Bobby. He always talks to me about you, you know? I should be sick of it by now but I actually like it when he does. I can tease him even more." He giggles lightly before flopping himself on the bed and looking at the ceiling.

"I love you. I love him. Please, take care of each other." 

One last sniffle before Hanbin was sure Chanwoo was crying. Except he wasn't, now completely blacked out like nothing happened. Looking at the handcuffs in hand, Hanbin mumbles out loud, "Drunk people are so fucking weird."

  
"What took you so long?" Bobby prompts. He opens the door of the car for him to get in. Hanbin shrugs at his question, looking at the side mirror to check his face. 

"Chanwoo was being dramatic." 

"Yeah, he's always a sappy drunk." 

"And what kind of drunk are you?" 

"Horny." he rubs the bottom of his lips while smiling.

Hanbin refrains from rolling his eyes.

"Last time I was drunk, I got my dick sucked." he continues.

"Well, next time, you'll get it chopped off."

  
They didn't go home yet, as per Hanbin's request. Bobby's car was parked by the town plaza, where they can see the city lights. They were making out, with him straddling Bobby's lap.

"Chanwoo..." he starts off, running his fingers on Bobby's thigh as the latter's lips trace the length of his throat. "He gave me something." 

Bobby hums, ignoring him as he sinks his teeth on the crook of his neck. He pushes him harshly, which makes him slump back on his seat. Bobby looks at him, wide-eyed, completely taken aback, brows meeting in confusion.

He retrieves the handcuffs slowly from the back of his pocket and shows it to Bobby. "Looks like he wants me to punish you." 

Bobby laughs nervously, staring at the handcuffs he's holding and then back at him. "What the hell, Bin? We're inside my car. You should punish me in my room. I'm more than willing."

He doesn't resist when Hanbin put both of his hands on the back of his seat, gulping in excitement as he hears the lock and sees Hanbin smiling gingerly.

"Don't you think it's more exciting here? We have a nice view." Hanbin nods at the city lights outside, lips pursed. He lifts Bobby's chin up.

"What exactly is my punishment?" 

"We'll get there eventually." He opens the buttons of Bobby's shirt, slowly, like they own the time. 

The cold bites his bare skin, but he doesn't mind. Hanbin's touch gives him goosebumps. It was gentle, teasing, and unhurried—hands crawling on his chest, warming him up. The tip of his index finger goes down to his nipples. Bobby breathes harshly, Hanbin halts. 

"If you moan, groan, or make any other worldly sound, I'm going to stop. Understand?" 

Bobby bites on his lip and nods, Hanbin smiles at him like he's a fucking dog agreeing to fetch a thrown bone.

Hanbin's lips close in on one nipple, tongue swirling, biting mindlessly, while his hand roams down Bobby's pants as he breathes harsher and harsher while keeping a word from coming out. 

He goes down to kiss his stomach, marking every pack, he kisses him through the clothing, feeling triumphant when he feels Bobby reacting immediately, getting hard.

Hanbin goes up again, up and up until his tongue was on Bobby's neck, all while deliberately palming his erection, trying so hard to make a word come out of his mouth so he'll lose. He bites on his neck, writing his initials using her tongue. _KHB_, in cursive. And every swipe burns.

"Is this familiar to you?" he whispers.

It was more than familiar. Bobby used it to Hanbin before, a kept promise. Something beyond his expectations. 

He stops mouthing on Bobby's neck to look at him. 

"I badly want to kiss you." He touches his lips, tracing the curve on the upper part and running his thumb on the plump lower part, pressing it lightly to make them open up.

"What's stopping you?" Bobby asks, rutting against Hanbin's palm, trying to get more friction even if he's not allowed to moan.

"I'm afraid..." Hanbin trails off, looking down at his lips, Bobby pushes the plump lower one between his teeth. "Fuck it."

And so they meet. Like fire and gasoline. They created sparks with their tongues, and if anyone could hear the sounds that their kisses make, they'd be dying of envy. 

He opens his mouth more and lets Bobby's tongue in deeper. Hanbin was fighting it. He doesn't want to moan. 

Bobby smirks against his lips, making it a mission to make a sound out of Hanbin before Hanbin can make it out of him. 

He pulls away, catching Hanbin's neck and licking it, and to be fair, he writes his own name too, _Jiwon_, longer and slower. 

Bobby feels a sting on his wrist because of the handcuffs but he didn't mind. He liked what he did. 

After doing so, he sucks it, hardly, that it actually left a mark. He goes down to Hanbin's collarbone, to his chest, to his tattoo.

His wrists might be bleeding from trying to reach Hanbin but again, he doesn't fucking care.

He bites the soft piece of cloth, urging Hanbin to take it off, and Hanbin, already dazed from the kiss and the sensation, complies. 

Bobby closes his mouth on his hardened nipple, doing exactly what Hanbin did to him. Complete with the tongue-swirling and shit. Except, he does it better. He does it with intensity, with his tongue flicking faster and faster, until...

"Jiwon—ahhh" Hanbin moans—no—screams. 

Bobby grazes his teeth on his body, smirking as he thrusts against Hanbin's palm once more. 

Hanbin pushes him with full force which makes him go back to his first position. It was also a relief for his aching wrists. 

Hanbin looks at him with annoyance, still catching his breath while Bobby licks his lip in victory.

"Did I just give you a nipple-gasm?" he teases.

"Fuck you." 

"Well, I'm actually waiting. You're moving too slow." Bobby lifts a brow and laughs.

"Come on, Bin. Release me. I'll make you feel better." 

Hanbin was still new to the idea of losing, but if he looks closer with Bobby's current state, lulled pleading eyes with chest left with trailing hickeys, he couldn't be any triumphant.

So he fishes for the key in his pocket and lets Bobby go, take care of him like what he claims, submit to him.

Bobby's wrists were sore. They were strained for too long that it almost bled, red marks circling them as a sign of restraint. It ached to be free. But he's got things to do.

He unzips Hanbin's fly, wrapping his hand on Hanbin's half-hard cock, cold and dry. 

"What about you?" Hanbin asks in a hushed tone, almost wanting to close his eyes in embarrassment when Bobby coated his shaft with his precome, gathering it with his thumb.

"Hmm what about me?" 

Hanbin doesn't answer, instead he unzips Bobby's fly too, his skin making contact with skin, achingly hard and flushed. Bobby hums when he did the same to him, slicking him up with his own patiently, he pumps him.

"I want..." he trails off, getting sick at the incessant beating of his head. It makes him dizzy, disoriented, drunk.

"I know, baby. I know what you want." 

Bobby carefully removes his fingers on him. He pushes Hanbin closer to him and presses their cocks together, he strokes them both.

He leans to flick his tongue on Hanbin's other nipple, the one he didn't pay much attention to earlier, as he pumps them both faster, hot and wet.

Hanbin's fingers hold onto his hair, tightening every time he goes faster, loosening when he goes slow. His tongue moves in the same intensity as his fist, groaning on Hanbin's skin when the latter thrusts up to his hand.

"God..." Hanbin's voice was beyond music to his ears. It was a whole orchestra, and he only said a word. 

"God, Jiwon..." Hanbin pulls down his hair, halting his ministrations on Hanbin's chest, Hanbin was panting before him, leaning down to press his lips on his and he welcomes him.

He welcomes the enveloping warmth of his tongue, inquisitively tasting every corner of his mouth, like they were doing this for the first time.

Hanbin's lips tasted of uncertainties, of what ifs, and soft as it is, it was also insecure.

This time, he's the one to thrust in his own hand.

This time, Hanbin gambles.

"Together, okay?" he heaves as Hanbin nods, rolling his hips to meet every stroke of his hand until both of them were leaking, releasing hot come on shaking hand. 

Hanbin moans a long whine, for what feels like forever, he does it again. He never stopped until Bobby presses his forehead on his, until they were breathing in the same direction.

He brings Bobby's wrists to his lips and kisses them.

  
///////

  
Hanbin and Bobby's relationship back then were much different than it is now.

Although the latter attended to him in every way, Bobby had better things to do than try and get in his pants. For starters, Bobby used to be in love. Way, way before he started to just be content with fooling around.

It was one-sided though—at least according to Bobby, because the only person who knew was him, just how he was the one who ruined it. 

Hanbin was young, and he only had Bobby as a friend, he was overprotective. When Bobby showed interest in a boy in their neighborhood, he didn't like it.

Jung Jinhyeong. A year younger than them. He doesn't go to the same school as theirs. Studying by day and working at night. 

He didn't like the way Bobby's eyes lit up whenever Jinhyeong showed up to one of his games. Granted, Bobby had given him the same bright eyes. 

And yes, young as he was, he didn't like that Jinhyeong sat so low in the hierarchy. That Jinhyeong wasn't on Bobby's level, will never be, not even if he works his ass off till he dies. 

He also didn't like that Jinhyeong's eyes lit up with the same brightness as Bobby's. 

He was blinded by his insecurity, and false sense of entitlement of whom Bobby was supposed to be friends with, or to fall in love with at that matter. 

So when Bobby was preparing for his confession, he told lies.

And he hurt people, instead of being happy. 

He told Jinhyeong Bobby took pity on him, only wanting to see how things look in his shoes, what's life like being poor trying to make ends meet. 

Before, he never reasoned with himself that what he did was wrong. It was for Bobby's good. He was just being a good friend. Besides, who knows what Jinhyeong was after. 

Bobby returned home devastated that day, _Jinhyeong was crying, Jinhyeong was hurt, Jinhyeong was gone._

Regret was a lingering feeling in his chest, seeing Bobby heartbroken. He cried then, because of Jinhyeong, unaware that Hanbin was the one who broke his heart.

If anything, Hanbin wasn't as remorseful as he was before today. He acknowledges now that what he did was wrong, and he felt sorry for him. 

But seeing the way Bobby looks at him now, before flipping him on his stomach, his weight lying on his back, tonguing the tattoo on his shoulder blade, fingers ghosting against his opening, he would do the same thing over again.

Because Bobby was right.

He wants him all for himself.

Bobby coats his fingers with lube, still kissing Hanbin's spine as he probes inside him deeper, finding the spot that makes him bite on the pillow, muffling his moans and pushing back on Bobby's rough fingers.

He giggles in his ear, licking the lobe once before speaking. "Want me to keep doing it?" 

Hanbin nods on the pillow, panting when Bobby presses hit on, firmly, never retreating. 

"What do you want, baby, tell me. I'll give you anything." Bobby bites on his thighs, kissing it tenderly whenever Hanbin cries out. 

"Cock...want your cock." he breathes, chewing harshly on his bottom lip when Bobby runs his tongue on the cheek of his ass, then rubs his cock against his opening, teasing him and laughing whenever he gasps.

"How do you want it?" 

Bobby tears open a pack of condom, rolling it in his cock and coating himself generously with lube. 

"Inside me. Come ooooon." Hanbin whines, and Bobby kisses him cheekily as he breaches him.

Inch by inch Hanbin feels it stretching him, taking his breath away when Bobby moves, slowly at first and then a fast-paced pounding that makes Hanbin lose his vision.

"Fuck." 

"You feel so fucking good." 

It wasn't long before Hanbin was mewling, reaching for Bobby's hand, "Touch me. Touch me, please, Jiwon." 

Bobby reaches down to touch Hanbin's cock, rolling his palm on the head before tugging at it, stroking him in time with his thrusts. And soon after, Hanbin comes, clenching his ass so tight as he does that Bobby feels his own orgasm hitting him too.

He pulls out immediately, removing the condom and pumping at his dick hurriedly, coming on Hanbin's back. 

Hanbin feels it on his skin, warm and sticky, but it wasn't until Bobby's tongue was licking him clean that he opens his eyes in shock. 

Bobby gather his own come on Hanbin's back, and instead of swallowing it, he flips Hanbin on his back, gripping his cheeks to make him open his lips as he _transfers_ his come from his mouth to Hanbin's, the latter swallowing it diligently like he was entranced. His tongue reaches out for the spilled ones on his chin and the side of his lips. Bobby was still gripping his cheeks. 

"Good." he gives him a chaste kiss. "My good, good boy." 

  
///////

  
Hanbin was nuzzled on Bobby's chest after Bobby had cleaned up both of them, the latter twirling his fingers on the strands of his hair as he closes his eyes in contentment.

This wasn't supposed to happen. He wasn't supposed to be comfortable with this. 

"Jiwon." he calls. Bobby hums. "What are we?" 

"Whatever you want us to be." Bobby answers.

And what would that be? What does he want for the both of them? 

"Friends don't fuck." Hanbin distances himself away from Bobby's chest to look up at him.

Bobby wants to argue. Say _of course they do_. They just fucked. "Then we'll be more than friends." he suggests.

Hanbin wasn't sure if he liked the sound of that.

Ownership in haste was one thing, committing fully was another.

He wants to tell him a lot of what ifs. But one that sits right with his feelings right now was _what if I don't want us to go further?_

"I need to tell you something." He figures it was time anyway. "About Jinhyeong. You remember him, right?" 

Bobby nods slowly, waiting for him to continue. 

"The night when you were about to confess, I went to his house to sabotage you. I told him about how you only showed him false empathy. How you make fun of him with me whenever he's not around. How you pity him. All of them were lies...and he believed it." 

It felt like a piece of his burden was lifted, not completely removed but enough to lessen the weight he carried. 

Before he could continue again with his confession, Bobby interrupts him.

"I know." 

Hanbin stares at him, confused. 

"Jinhyeong told me. When I went to see him that day. He told me everything." Bobby's hand stills on the small of his back, eyes transfixed on the ceiling. "He wasn't in love with me, you know. It was _you_. Jinhyeong loved you, instead of me." 

Then it hit him, like waves forced to meet the shore. 

Bobby knows. He knows everything. He's aware of what he's done. Jinhyeong told him way back. And Jinhyeong...with him...

No, this was definitely not supposed to be like this.

He found himself reeling, holding his breath, what's little left of it. 

Bobby was in love with Jinhyeong. And Jinhyeong was in love with him. Bobby knows. Bobby lied. Bobby did everything for _revenge_. 

How could he be so naive? Bobby obviously wanted to get back. He was hurt before and still now. Hanbin, having let his guard down one, twice, thrice?...he let Bobby win again, until he was left with nothing.

Every victory was made in pretense. 

He glances at Bobby's face, one last time.

"I think we should stop doing this." he says, removing himself out of Bobby's hold.

"Did I say something?" The hint of concern on Bobby's voice was making him sick.

He shook his head. "You were a good past time though, but we shouldn't ruin our friendship just like that." 

Bobby was trying to find the right words to say back, his mouth parting and closing again, like giving up. "Past time, right." He sits up to gather his things, putting his clothes back on without looking back at him.

"Thanks for today." 

Hanbin closes his eyes tightly when he hears the loud shut of the door. Bobby left. 

Last time he felt this alone was when he was trying to get Bobby to play with him 10 years ago. 


	2. ii

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the truth unravels before Hanbin as he realizes something which was long overdue. He hopes it wasn't too late.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took too long.
> 
> Also, let's all pretend Junhoe and Hanbin's birthday were close to each other lol

It wasn't Hanbin when Bobby wasn't there. 

They always, _always_ go together, if not side by side, at least they were in one room. Every Christmas, every new year, every birthday. Wherever Hanbin goes, Bobby was there. Many photographs in their family album was proof of that.

Nothing had ever prepared him for _this_.

Bobby's absence.

Not even when Bobby was pinning over a foreign exchange student for days without seeing him.

"Chanwoo, quit playing. Just tell me where he is." his voice was beginning to sound irritable, Chanwoo wasn't much of a help.

"I told you a lot of times, Hanbin, I don't know. He didn't tell me. Not a word, really. It's like we're not even friends to begin with." Chanwoo feigns a heartbreak and Hanbin narrows his eyes.

"Fine, suit yourself." He leaves him alone.

In the beginning of the first week after he told Bobby off, he didn't actually care.

Because he didn't know Bobby would actually be gone.

He just thought he was taking sick leaves and he didn't even bother to show up at their house to confirm it.

His realization—although completely not proven yet—just pained him. To think that Bobby was willing to go through lengths just to get back at him. For ruining his chances, and being responsible for his first heartbreak.

He realized too, that maybe he deserved it. Maybe it was God's way of punishing him for being such an entitled jerk who didn't know better. 

There was a little thought on the back of his brain, resting on his subconscious, eating him up, wanting to be let out, to be known, and when he did acknowledge it, it was just a long cry of regret.

That maybe, just maybe, Bobby never really cared about the past. 

That he hurt him again, this time, directly and he was so caught up in his own inner turmoil that he didn't see the sadness in Bobby's eyes.

When he went for his morning classes that day (he actually didn't want to, considering the amount of hickeys he had to cover up, he was forced to wear a turtleneck instead), he felt that something wasn't right. 

Bobby didn't show up for Business Maths, which was unusual because he never misses a single class. 

Yunhyeong took him to the football field to watch his new boyfriend warm up. He was reluctant at first because the last thing he wanted was bump into Bobby—which was, again, in who knows god where.

If he were to be honest, he kinda liked it.

Bobby made an effort to distance himself with him. He commends it because he wouldn't know how to act or what to say if they ever cross paths while his feelings dangle on his sleeves. 

If he were to be _perfectly_ honest, he kinda missed him.

It has been officially a week. Where has Bobby gone? He never bothered looking up for him before until now. 

The rankings for the month were out. Kim Hanbin was a name permanently engraved on top. And Kim Jiwon...like his physical state was nowhere to be found.

"What happened?" Yunhyeong asks when he finally catches up after Hanbin walks out from Chanwoo, walking impossibly fast.

"Chanwoo's being a dick. I'm sure Jiwon told him where the fuck he is, he's just not telling me." Hanbin blurts, breathing heavily from walking out of his usual pace.

"No, I mean, what happened between you and Bobby?" 

Oh.

Hanbin wasn't expecting that. 

Yunhyeong was one of his closest friends, maybe even the only one considering how alone he feels right now. But will it be worth it to tell whatever _really_ happened between him and Bobby? And what if Yunhyeong judges him from his past decisions and present choices? Will he lose him too?

"Nothing. He just went away without telling me." So he refrains from explaining everything, only giving out the smallest, trivial information.

"For a week? And without telling you? Do you really think I would believe that? Dude's so in love with you that if he ever goes away this long, he'll probably take you with him." 

But Yunhyeong doesn't understand. He doesn't need to. This was his problem. 

  
///////

  
Bobby's social media sites were gone too. He deactivated all of them. And when he tried calling him, he was blocked. 

"I told him we should stop fucking, not stop being friends. God, he's so stupid." he pulls out his hair in frustration, refreshing Bobby's Facebook page like it would miraculously reappear.

Maybe he's the stupid one.

All it took was one, two, cups of coffee before he finally decided to think deeply and use his brain. 

He takes the Benz to go to Bobby's residence. Cursing at himself for not doing this earlier, letting a week pass by without visiting his house, all the answers to his questions might just be waiting for him there.

The house was empty. 

Which leads him to a conclusion, making him wonder why the hell is his brain only working just now.

He calls Junhoe. 

Unlike his cousin, Junhoe picked up on the first ring.

_"Hey, what's up?" _

"What's up my dick, you fuckers." he exhales, brushing his hair with his fingers in hopes of brushing away his anger.

_"Woah, what'd I do?" _Junhoe had the nerve to giggle. And Hanbin was losing it. 

A barren week of finding where had Bobby gone and now his cousin, who's probably with him, is laughing at him.

"Tell your stupid, bird-brained of a cousin that he's so sick in the head for...for..." he trails off, forgetting why he was mad at Bobby leaving him in the first place. Why exactly is he so worked up about it that he feels like crying right now? 

"Is he with you?" his tone becomes soft, hopeful even.

_"No."_ Junhoe answers.

The same sting that has been sitting on his chest makes it even harder to breathe. Where the hell is Bobby?

_"He's in the other room."_ Junhoe roars in laughter when Hanbin lets out a whole series of curses, almost everything in existence, in every languages he knows.

"Where are you?" He says when he finally recovers, breathing back to normal, but still a little bit anxious.

_"Family trip? Tech conference in NYC. Jiwon didn't tell you?" _

Tech conference. In New York. God, of course! His own father told him about it before and asked him if he would want to come but he was too caught up with Bobby that he doesn't even remember if he ever agreed to it or not. 

"Obviously." he rolls his eyes.

_"Hmmm, I wonder." _

"Anyway, when are you guys coming back?"

It didn't hurt to try. At least he'll know how much longer he will wait. Why is he waiting anyway? 

_"Dunno. We're still strolling around, probably one more week or after a month at most. But if you really miss me that much, I could come home right away."_

Hanbin hears the smugness in Junhoe's voice and he ignores him, asking another question. "How about your studies? You guys missed out school for a week." He wasn't sure about Junhoe but the question wasn't specifically for him anyway.

_"I'm on a semester break. Jiwon, well, I don't know about him coz we don't really talk much but he's probably submitting assignments online." _

That would make sense. He hangs up on Junhoe after a few more minutes, sighing as he drives himself home.

Looks like Bobby won't be around for his birthday.

  
///////

  
A club. 

Honestly, Hanbin thinks this is probably the lowest point of his life. 

He and Yunhyeong went to go club-sourcing. It was all Yunhyeong's plan.

Make him go clubbing for his birthday. 

Personally, he would just like to be alone in his house, maybe invite a few friends (only Yunhyeong, maybe even Chanwoo since the latter had admitted that Bobby only texted him once before he went away and it was a simple "will be out, continue training" ), then eat pizza. 

Yunhyeong had apparently other things in mind. Naturally, he would protest but this was the least he could do for keeping things from his friend. Birthdays are for giving after all.

They decided to go on a Saturday morning, reasoning that they could get a good look of the club if it's still empty. 

The club was a drive away from the city, _Blue Suéde_, in cursive and unlit. It was his first time seeing it. 

They were greeted by the owner, in casual clothes and unkempt hair, looking like he just woke up. He was moving chairs. 

Yunhyeong did all the talking, it was his idea anyway. He figured he really has no say about it so he stepped aside, roaming his eyes around the club. It wasn't until Yunhyeong and the owner decided to go upstairs to see the VIP section that he decided to be left behind, focused on one of the cleaners, who looked really familiar. 

When he recovers from his shock, he walks up to him, tapping his shoulders so he can face him and look at him closely. 

The guy turns around, almond eyes meeting his, the same soft face years ago when he was still a teenager. He never changed.

"Oh, Hanbin hyung."

"Jinhyeong."

They sat in one of the booths. Jinhyeong had dropped his cleaning duty, putting back the mop on the corner beside the door. He pats his hands dry on his cargo shorts.

"Haven't seen you in a long time, hyung."

He couldn't believe it. Jinhyeong was just a drive away from them. Almost an arm-stretch reach. Has he been here the whole time? He has absolutely no idea.

Hanbin smiles, sipping on the water glass Jinhyeong had served him a while ago. "How long have you been working here?" he inquired, observing Jinhyeong more closely. He looks just as how he was before. Except a little taller.

"I just got back two months ago." Jinhyeong smiles back, tapping his fingers on the table. A habit—Hanbin remembers—he's never gotten rid of. "I never thought I would ever see you here. Bobby hyung told me you're not a fan of clubs." he lets out a light laugh.

Hanbin stills at that, thoughts about Jinhyeong's appearance subsiding. 

He met Bobby. 

And Bobby didn't tell him.

As much as he wants to reason with it, he couldn't help but feel like they plotted against him. And maybe he deserved all of it. 

"Ah, so you guys already met." he murmurs. 

Jinhyeong nods. "Back when his teammates still used to celebrate their victory parties here. I work as a bartender at night. We didn't talk much actually. They were always in the VIP." he points his finger upstairs.

Before they finally decided to just celebrate in Chanwoo's house (to save themselves from future troubles), the football team was always in the club after every won game. 

Bobby never failed to invite him but he never failed to refuse either. Sometimes he would wait for him outside to fetch him but only to that extent. He wasn't aware of Jinhyeong's existence in the said club.

There was a momentary silence between them. Just the sound of Jinhyeong's fingers tapping on the wooden table. Hanbin clears his throat, catching Jinhyeong's attention. 

"I wanted to apologize." he starts off. "For what I said years ago."

Jinhyeong takes his hand and sends him a reassuring smile. "Hyung, it's fine. Honestly. You were young that time. You acted with your emotions. I was hurt mainly because it reflected what you thought of me, I knew it from the start because I was closer to Bobby hyung than with you. He was more open whereas you were distant. But everything's fine now. At least for me." he shoots him a worried look.

Jinhyeong is smart. He was convinced he can see through people. 

"Was it true?" he stares at him, gulping before continuing. "That you were in love with me? And not with Jiwon?" 

He didn't understand why he missed it. The signs. Jinhyeong never even looked at him the way he looked at Bobby. 

He doesn't know everytime Jinhyeong took the time to stare at him, he never stared back. Everything was stolen glances with hopeful eyes. 

"Well, yeah. I told Bobby hyung and he agreed to help me court you." Jinhyeong's face turns into a shade of pink, blushing as he looks away from Hanbin's eyes. "When you came up to me, I was confused as to why you're telling me about Bobby hyung and then I realized those were actually what you feel about me. Bobby hyung went to me too when you left. I told him everything." he pauses, recalling memories from years ago. He glances at Hanbin, listening to every word he says, shock painting his face. 

"He told me you guys were actually together. And that he was sorry for leading me on, or for propositioning himself to help. When I told him to leave me alone, he cried too. And then...well..I left." 

Hanbin's mind was racing. The truth intruding his brain was causing him to have a headache.

Bobby did lie.

To him, to Jinhyeong. He did everything for his own benefit.

And Hanbin did hurt Jinhyeong.

For all the wrong reasons. 

He wasn't aware of how much control Bobby has over him.

Bobby was never in love with Jinhyeong. He never planned to confess that day like what he told him. He never cried because his heart was broken. He cried because he lost a friend. Because he was guilty of his lies.

Jinhyeong was oblivious to all of these. Someone trapped in between. Hurting in the process. They both hurt him, intentionally and for different things, but both were rooted from the desire to keep each other to themselves. 

Yunhyeong came back, laughing with the owner as they both come down the stairs. 

He talked with Jinhyeong for a few more minutes before they left and the latter was back to his cleaning. 

  
///////

  
"He blocked my number." he explains to Junhoe over the phone. He knows it was probably midnight in New York but Junhoe never sleeps anyway so he bothers him.

_"I think your mind is getting exhausted nowadays. It would explain the lack of ideas you come up with."_ he hears Junhoe's yawn, and the rustling of the bed meaning a shift in position. 

"What do you mean?" Hanbin asks.

_"What I mean is, why don't you buy a new phone or a new sim and use it to call him. Wow, I wonder why you're always top of your class." _

He glares at his phone when Junhoe hangs up. Probably too tired of his bullshit. The bastard was right. Where has his brain gone? If he just resorted to considering Junhoe's ideas he must've actually lost his mind.

The new phone required a little work before he could finally use it. He types in Bobby's number, which he knows by heart, and dials it.

He made sure to call when it was morning in Bobby's place for a better chance of response. 

Bobby answers on the third ring. His heart was racing.

_"Who's this?"_ his voice sounds different. Like he forgot how it used to sound, hearing it for the first time. Hoarse. He knows he just woke up.

_"Hello?" _

Hanbin doesn't know why he couldn't bring himself to talk. When he opened his mouth, no words were coming out. He wants to say a novel. He wants to shout at him, and tell him how stupid he was, blame him for everything, call him a liar, tell him he loves him...

_"Kim Hanbin." _

His name was always perfect whenever it came out of Bobby's mouth. Like he was meant to say it. How Bobby knows it was him with just his breathing he wasn't sure. However, the _why_ only leads to one answer: Bobby loves him too.

_"Why did you call me then decide not to talk?"_

A few more words were enough for him to gather courage and speak. "I missed you."

He was hoping Bobby would say it back. Tell him how much he wants to see his face right now, that hearing his voice was enough for Bobby to forgive him. All while he silently wipes the tears streaming down his cheeks.

_"No, you're just bored. Maybe you should find another pastime." _

The other line goes silent, and then a single beep when Bobby finally hangs up.

This time, he keeps his hands off his face and lets himself cry.

  
///////

  
They were eating lunch silently, him and Yunhyeong. The latter accepted he would just be like this forever. Silent. With bloodshot eyes and almost no appetite. 

Hanbin notices Yunhyeong was looking at him hesitantly, like he wants to say something but decides against it. "What?" he presses.

Yunhyeong sighs, shoving his phone to Hanbin's hand to show him a picture.

It was of Bobby with Kim Jinhwan. The caption says the photo was taken by Junhoe. Bobby was leaning on the railings of the balcony which looks like from their hotel room, smirking on the camera. His hair was getting longer, tucked behind both of his ears and pushed back. He was also wearing thin-framed clear silver glasses. Jinhwan was beside him, leaning on his shoulder, winking and showing two fingers as a peace sign. 

_They look good together._

"I didn't know Bobby was close with Jinhwan." Yunhyeong mumbles.

Hanbin returns the phone to Yunhyeong. He goes back to eating like nothing happened. Conjuring up more than one reason as to why Bobby and Jinhwan were in New York together. Holding on to the memory of Bobby's voice when he said his name. He should trust him more.

It didn't feel good.

The same day, Junhoe sends him a picture of Bobby. Just him. Sleeping peacefully in the car. 

_From: Junhoe_

_This one's for you._

He saves it in his phone, smiling a little before he types in a reply. He wasn't finished typing when Junhoe sent him a message again.

_From: Junhoe_

_We'll be coming back tomorrow. Just in time for your birthday! _

Hanbin immediately deletes what he just typed and rushes to send a reply in excitement. 

_To: Junhoe_

_Really? And Jiwon?_

Junhoe's reply was quick. He reads it, hopeful. 

_From: Junhoe_

_Sorry, he said he wanted to stay a little bit longer. He'll come home after a few days. _

Hanbin's excitement immediately goes down. Same with his face. Why did he even expect Bobby to be there on his birthday? 

When he was home, he picks up his newly bought phone to try and call Bobby. Maybe even persuade him. He's been away for too long. 

He was surprised when the call was answered immediately, faster than last time.

_"Hello?" _

And was disappointed to hear another man's voice on the other line. He wasn't sure who it was but he sounds familiar. Remembering the photo a while ago, it could be Kim Jinhwan.

_"It says here your name is Hanbin? I think I remember you."_ Jinhwan laughs a little._ "Jiwon went out to buy food. I'll let him know you called." _

Ah, yes. He almost forgot Jinhwan calls him Jiwon. Like he does. They must be really close right now, more than ever.

Hanbin wants to ask more questions. About him. About them. But since he was desperate, he pleads, throwing away his pride. "Please tell him to come home. I really, really miss him. It would be nice if we could celebrate my birthday together." 

Without waiting for Jinhwan to answer, saving what's little left of his dignity, he ends the call.

His day couldn't get any worse.

  
///////

  
He went to the airport to fetch Junhoe. Holding a sign to welcome him, his puffy eyes hidden behind his iridescent aviators. 

Surprisingly, Junhoe was with Jinhwan. The latter's arm linked with Junhoe's. They were laughing together, taking a moment too long before they finally notice him.

Junhoe goes in for a hug, caging him in his arms, and feigning a cry. Jinhwan laughs at this.

"I hope you missed me as much as you missed the guy who shall not be named." Junhoe whispers.

"Not much." Hanbin whispers back and Junhoe pushes him lightly.

Junhoe turns his head to face Jinhwan and pulls him closer, intertwining their hands. Hanbin raises his brow in confusion.

"Finally." Junhoe exclaims. "Meet my boyfriend." he proceeds.

"I told you we already met." Jinhwan tells Junhoe, smiling.

Hanbin takes his time to process what Junhoe just said. Boyfriend. Jinhwan. His.

"Wait, what?" his eyes widening in shock. "Since when?" 

"Uh, since four months ago? Was it four months ago, babe?" Junhoe asks and Jinhwan just shrugs.

"I thought...I thought you were Jiwon's..." he didn't finish his sentence, putting two and two together, recalling past details as realization hits him dead on. 

Of course he would call him Jiwon. Of course they would be in New York together. Everything just makes sense now.

"Ah that rascal. He told me to accompany him for a little to make you jealous. Remember in the car?" Jinhwan gives him a meaningful glance. 

And God, he was so stupid. Bobby made him look stupid. Here he was, with puffy red eyes, crying over Bobby and his supposed-to-be love affair who happens to be his cousin's boyfriend whom he used to make him riled up. 

He doesn't know what's real or not anymore.

  
///////

  
The year was 2016. 

Hanbin had no plans for his birthday except sulk after getting rejected by Bobby. He asked the latter if he could accompany him to the salon since he wanted to dye his hair. Bobby outright rejected him, told him he had football practice. Which he knew was a lie, obviously, because he saw some of his teammates going home already.

But he still pushed through with dyeing his hair, since he doesn't want to be an inconvenience as he had already booked a schedule. He flopped on his bed after checking out how he looked in the mirror with blonde hair. 

It doesn't suit him.

He groaned, burying his face more on the pillow when he heard a knock. Then came Bobby's voice. 

"We're leaving in an hour, birthday boy. Got your things all packed. Come out!" 

"What?" he said, but the sound was mostly muffled by the pillow.

Then the door opened. He forgot Bobby had a key. The next thing he knew Bobby was dragging him to his Porsche, off to his surprise birthday party in a beach house. 

At first he thought it was just the two of them. But he spotted some of his friends. He was happy. 

"Happy birthday." Bobby whispered in his ear. 

"Thank you, Jiwon." he smiled, forgetting why he was sulking in the first place.

Bobby was a year older than him. He had to repeat 2nd grade because he got in trouble with a son of another rich family. His father didn't want to pay for the damages so he compensated and was demoted for another year. 

He doesn't call him _hyung_. Bobby doesn't act like one anyway. He's good with it.

Right now he was surrounded with a whole different set of people. Mostly only familiar faces from his university. They probably don't even know it's his birthday, just thought someone was throwing a party. 

Yunhyeong apologized to him a while ago. Said he only invited those he knows Hanbin was friends with but someone overheard and news travels fast so here he is, the birthday boy, half drunk and undeniably lonely. On the bright side, he did just throw the biggest party. There's that.

"Maybe you should stop drinking." Yunhyeong never left his side, still guilty about how the party turned out. Of course, although Hanbin didn't like it, he doesn't blame him. At least he made an effort to please him, make him smile a little. It was enough. 

"Your boyfriend's a mess on the dance floor." he puckers his lips to point at Yunhyeong's boyfriend. "Go and dance with him. I'll be fine." he smiles to convince him, downing another glass of vodka, or tequila, he doesn't know by now.

Yunhyeong eyes him hesitantly and he shoos him away with his hand before he finally leaves. Hanbin observes him and with his boyfriend as they dance together. 

He wonders how his birthday would turn out if he didn't fuck things up with Bobby. If he only chose to reason with himself instead of protecting his pride and letting regret eat him up. If only he realized sooner how much of his life had depended on Bobby. 

Every moment that passed without him had been a total waste. 

He wasn't half drunk anymore. He lost count of how many drinks he had downed. He was full on drunk, and the last time he was this intoxicated he embarrassed himself by telling kinks. 

But he doesn't actually care. Because he feels a moment of happiness as he times the sway of his hips with the booming club music. 

Suddenly, everyone that surrounds him were strangers. He doesn't recognize them. He squints his eyes as the different colored lights reflect on his face, trying to find familiar faces among the sea of unknowns. Someone he knows must've been out there. 

And then, he was being dragged away from the heat of the dance floor, out of the crowd, and out of the club. 

He closes his eyes, content and smiling. Finally, he can breathe.

When it seems like he had forgotten how to walk, he thought he learned how to fly. His feet was off the ground, his body lifted, arms automatically closing on the strong figure of a man who held him. 

He should shout. Tell Yunhyeong he was being kidnapped, ask for help. But he didn't know why he didn't feel the need to. He felt okay with it. Like he knows who took him.

"Who are you?" he whispers, rubbing his cheek on the guy's chest, trying to muster himself awake.

"Hanbin, this is Jaewon. I'm taking you home." 

Hanbin hums, the speech barely even registering in his brain. "Sounds like Jiwon. Wish he was here." he mumbles.

"He is here. He's the one who asked me to take you home." Jaewon chuckles.

But Hanbin was drifting into sleep to even hear him.

  
///////

  
Due to his fucked up sleeping schedule and his recurring insomnia, he doesn't dream much.

And even if he does, they're mostly nightmares about serial killers and unsolved true crimes. 

"Jiwon-ah." he calls, smiling even if the dream gets hazier by the minute.

"Happy birthday." Bobby greets, he wasn't smiling but he hands him a gift. Hanbin takes it with shaking hands, the small box feeling impossibly real. He puts it on his bedside table, determined to just focus his attention to Bobby without distractions. 

When he feels Bobby's fingers on his face, tucking the stray hairs behind his ears, he cries, sobbing uncontrollably especially when Bobby pulls him close in a hug. He buries his face in Bobby's chest. 

This was the familiarity he sought a while ago. His scent permeating through his system, his warmth all the more comfortable. 

"I love you. I love you, don't leave me again." 

There weren't any answers but dreams were supposed to be like that, _limited_. 

Bobby was gone when he woke up.

He looks around to find any evidence of him. There was none. Except a small box on his bedside table. He immediately gets it. Finding a piece of note with a scrawled handwriting. 

_hbd_   
_-jiwon_

He lets out a curse. It wasn't a dream! Bobby was back. Bobby hugged him. Bobby gave him a gift. He returned on his birthday!

He opens the small box. It was a Swatch watch called School Break. It wasn't costly, barely even a hundred dollars. But he remembers babbling on about it with Bobby before. Telling him it's cute but he'll never buy it for himself because he'll look like a childish fool. Bobby only laughed at him so he figures he never really put much thought about it. 

Until now.

It looks ridiculous on his wrist. Completely out of place when he wore his uniform, but it was from Bobby, and he likes it. 

His drive off to school was chirpier than usual. He couldn't stop smiling, despite his splitting headache which he tried to subdue by drinking hot chocolate. 

Bobby was back. It's all that matters.

They met in the corridors. Bobby walks past him and he catches his arm, pulling at it to make Bobby face him.

Hanbin gives him a once over. This time he was clearer than last night. It feels like he was a new person altogether, except his face was the same. His hair was in a ponytail. He dyed it in purple. He looks good. 

"Jiwon, eat lunch with me." he says.

Bobby carefully removes Hanbin's hand on his arm, rubbing it after like it hurts.

"I still need to catch up. Maybe next time." and he leaves.

Hanbin still smiles though. Because he catches Bobby looking at his wrist, noting that he's wearing his gift. He was sure he saw his eyes sparkle.

Bobby's return meant he was also back in the fields. And Chanwoo was more than happy to welcome him. Although he was a bit sulky at first, Bobby promised him a bucket of chicken wings in their next victory party. 

The friendlies were done and it was a new season for a whole set of matches with other departments. 

Hanbin settles himself on the bleachers, with Jaewon tailing him, holding their snacks. They were seated beside each other. He wants to thank him, for taking him home and not letting anything bad happen to him. Jaewon tells him it's nothing.

When Hanbin turns his head to finally fix his eyes on the field, he catches Bobby looking at him, avoiding his gaze immediately while shaking his head and focusing waiting for the kick-offs. Hanbin bites his lip as he smiles.

Bobby's team won. They almost didn't. A penalty kick saved them. Nevertheless, a goal is a goal and every victory calls for a celebration.

Just like before, Hanbin waits for Bobby outside the shower room. Chanwoo comes out first, giving him a mischievous smile.

"Go inside." Chanwoo tells him.

"What?"

"Surprise him." Chanwoo pushes him inside the shower room and closes the door. 

He saunters through the stalls hesitantly, hearing the drip of the shower on the final one, he stops on the third.

He's been here before. During PE. But he decided to drop the subject in his second semester.

"Chanwoo is that you? Get me a towel. I forgot to bring it here." the dripping stops, Hanbin's heart was pounding. 

He looks around to find the towel and retrieves it before being courageous enough to show himself.

Bobby grabs the towel from his hand, eyeing him sternly as he wraps it around his hips.

"What are you doing here?" Bobby asks.

"Chanwoo pushed me inside." he reasons.

Bobby scoffs. "Are you trying to seduce me or something? Because if you are, you're failing miserably by just standing there." 

So, feeling a little pressured, Hanbin walks up to him, closer until their faces were inches apart. He lifts up his hand to wipe off the droplets of water on Bobby's chest, patting it dry. Bobby's mouth parts, releasing a silent gasp. Hanbin rejoices inside.

Before he could tweak Bobby's nipple like what he plans to, Bobby catches his wrist. 

"Stop it." he says softly, it doesn't sound like a command. More to him than to Hanbin. "Get out. Your new watch might get wet." he lets him go.

"Okay, _hyung_." Hanbin obliges, feeling victorious especially when he catches Bobby's whisper of a curse. 

Bobby stays inside a little more, getting another cold shower while trying his best not to fuck his fist.

  
///////

It feels like everything was back to normal. He was inside Bobby's car, in the passenger's seat as usual. And even though Bobby wasn't talking much, avoiding his eyes with every chance he gets, his heart still flutters. 

He knows he hasn't lost him. He just needs to push the right buttons so he can finally give in. He rests his hands on Bobby's thigh while Bobby drives, chewing on his lip when Bobby lets him. He rubs it, trying to imitate the rhythm of a massage. When his hand went further up, Bobby accidentally steps on the brake.

"Stop doing that." Bobby says sharply.

"Doing what?" he asks with innocent eyes, creasing his forehead in confusion.

"Touching me. Stop...touching me." he removes Hanbin's hand on his thigh and continues to drive.

Hanbin was more than happy to keep his hands to himself. At least he knows he still has an effect on Bobby. He licks his lip in delight and leans his head on the window.

Bobby doesn't talk to him when they get out, still when they were inside Chanwoo's house. But he never left his side and Hanbin commended that. When he finally did, it was to let loose and drink, taking his turn on the keg stand as the other students cheered for him. 

Hanbin finds himself staying in Chanwoo's bedroom, watching a chick-flick rerun with a bucket of chicken wings on his lap. Chanwoo gave him the free food Bobby bought him and he happily accepted. 

It was almost midnight when he deemed it was time to go home. Bobby was probably too wasted to even drive. He found him sprawled on the couch with a red cup in his hand. He taps his face lightly.

"Jiwon." he calls.

Bobby groans, wiping the back of his mouth before turning his back on Hanbin. He has no choice but to carry him outside, and Bobby was heavy. He hooks Bobby's arm on his shoulders as they walk towards Bobby's car. 

Bobby's eyes were closed on their way home. Hanbin glances at him once in a while.

"Fuck you." Bobby says suddenly right after he tucks him into bed.

"Fuck you, Kim Hanbin. Fuck your face. Fuck your voice. Fuck your idea of me." Bobby looks like he wasn't finished yet, but right now it's all that he could muster.

"Yeah, I know. Maybe we're bad for each other." Hanbin says seriously, brushing off the purple strands of hair on Bobby's forehead. It suits him. 

"You're such a fucking trash and I will never forgive you." Hanbin's heart breaks, hearing Bobby's words stabbing him open. Something in him doesn't believe it. That Bobby thinks of him this way. 

It was proven when Bobby says his own name in a whisper, while a single tear falls on his cheek.

"Kim Jiwon, you don't deserve him." Bobby tells himself. 

But Hanbin would like to object. He thinks he deserves every part of him. As fucked up as it was, they both manipulated each other into falling in love and as cruel as it sounds, it worked. Granted, they hurt other people, them likewise, in the process, but that's what makes them imperfect and that's what makes them perfect for each other.

  
///////

  
Hanbin was rather excited. When he received a text message from Bobby on a Saturday morning he jumped on the bed a few times.

_From: Jiwon_

_come over and get ur presents from mom_

He makes sure to dress up. The weather was a little chilly in the morning so he opts for a hoodie, that is before he came across a black box hidden deep inside his closet. He untangles the yellow ribbon and sees a pair of girl uniforms. Bobby's gift. How could he forget about it?

Hanbin doesn't know if he has lost his mind. All he knows is that he felt good when he tried it on. He looks at himself in the mirror as he fixes the bow tie. He smiles. 

And sure, it would be a bad idea to wear it. Instead, he puts on a thick cream-colored trench coat that reaches his knees, covering what he intended to wear. 

Bobby would lose his mind.

That's exactly the plan. 

He shifts in his seat as he was being driven to Bobby's house, careful not to let any material of the uniform show. It was a surprise anyway. 

The house still looks empty, save for a few helpers. He heads upstairs, gripping tightly on his coat as he knocks on Bobby's door. He opens it when he hears Bobby's _come in_ and clicks the lock.

Bobby lifts his head up on the book he was reading to acknowledge his presence. His head goes down again immediately after he points the abundant paper bags on the side of the door waiting for him. 

But that was the least of Hanbin's concerns. He walks towards Bobby, the latter giving up on reading and putting down the book. He cocks an eyebrow. 

"Take the bags and leave." Bobby says.

"What if I don't want to?" 

"Look, Bin, I got things to do. I told you I still need to catch up and—_fuck_." Hanbin removes his coat, revealing the school girl's uniform that Bobby had gifted him, hugging his body in a perfect fit, supple thighs in display along with his smooth legs. 

Bobby looks at him from head to toe, like he couldn't believe he exists. And something was stuck in his throat as he never spoke after he said fuck.

Hanbin was starting to feel embarrassed, his cheeks burning from Bobby's gaze. He didn't think it would feel this humiliating, he was so confident a while ago. But seeing Bobby's eyes raking on him, like he was ready to worship him, he feels his heart flutter, and he almost fans his face with his hand from the heat. 

He looks down shyly, his fingers playing on the hem of his skirt. "Do you still want me to leave?" he mumbles, unable to look Bobby in the eye. 

The next minute, Bobby was inches away from him, lifting his chin up so he could face him.

"You're planning to kill me, Kim Hanbin. And I think I have a death wish." 

The next second, he was thrown on the bed, completely manhandled by Bobby as he crashed his lips on his.

Bobby feels all of his grips falling, except for the one holding Hanbin's tiny waist, pushing him close so their chest could collide like their mouths, giving in and tasting the familiar sweetness of his lips. Pomegranates. 

He moans when they first started tonguing, fighting for dominance. If temptation tastes this good, he can't blame Eve.

Hanbin closes his fist on Bobby's shirt asking him to take it off and Bobby complies, pulling away from the kiss and then back again. He missed him. He missed this.

"You look stunning. God, I never thought I'd see you like this." Bobby whispers as he kisses his neck, sucking on it to leave trails of hickeys. He lifts up Hanbin's skirt to palm him through his silk black briefs. He feels his cheeks burning. 

Bobby kisses him through the material, tonguing the tip of his dick and wetting the clothing. Hanbin moans, his fingers carded through Bobby's purple mane. 

Looks like they both lost their bets. Him in a school uniform, Bobby with his newly dyed hair. If anything, he's thankful. He'll take losing over a win anytime if he gets to see Bobby going crazy over him.

Bobby pulls down his briefs to his knees, giving his dick kitten licks as he removes it all the way down and throws it away. He hollows his cheeks and sucks him, bobbing his head up and down in a ruthless manner as Hanbin pants and shouts, his eyes rolling upwards, canting his hips and pushing Bobby's head further. 

"Jiwon..." he calls, closing his eyes tightly. "Jiwon, stop, I'm close." he pleads but Bobby pays him no attention, determined to make him come. Bobby removes his hand gripping on his hair and holds it. Looking up at Hanbin as he takes him in further so that his dick reaches the back of his throat.

Hanbin cries a shout before he was spurting down Bobby's throat, wincing as Bobby swallows around him. He lets him go with a pop and Hanbin swears, breathing heavily with tears at the side of his eyes. 

"On your knees, baby." Bobby says as he removes his own clothing, leaving him with nothing, watching Hanbin comply, his skirt riding up showing his plump ass and God—Bobby doesn't even want to hold back.

Hanbin feels Bobby's hot breath ghosting upon his ass, his tongue dangerously close to his entrance. He wants to protest, tell him no. He never had anyone's mouth near his hole and he feels embarrassed about it. But when he feels the first swipe of Bobby's tongue, he moans, Bobby's tight grip on his thighs were more than happy to keep him in place as Bobby eats him out, licking fat stripes all the way from his balls and up to his entrance. 

Hanbin finds himself fucking back, muffling his moans on the pillow as he pushes himself on Bobby's tongue. 

"Wanna get fucked?" Bobby slaps his ass, his chest pounding as he feels the sting and Bobby does it again. "Tell me how much you missed me, hmm?" Bobby licks his cheek, planting a kiss on it after. "Or how sorry you are." He flips him again on his back. 

He avoids Bobby's gaze, ashamed at his current state. Bobby tilts his chin, giving him a chaste kiss before pulling away and looking at him directly. "Prep yourself." he orders.

"What?"

"You heard me." Bobby releases him, leaning back to let him do what he just said.

Hanbin looks at Bobby one more time, hoping he was joking. But Bobby looks like he was waiting for him to move. He hesitantly grabs the lube under Bobby's pillow and Bobby immediately tuts, shaking his head and retrieving the lube away from Hanbin.

"No lube, baby." he shoots him a mocking smile. "I just licked you thoroughly, I'm sure you can manage. You can use your come if you want." Bobby nods at Hanbin's cock, glistening with precome and Hanbin's cheeks burn. Embarrassment eating him up.

It's not enough that he's wearing a school girl's uniform, he also has to prep himself. The things he does to get fucked. 

Hanbin disregards every moral, every pride, every dignity he has left and spits on his fingers, he repositions himself to reach his hole better and gasps as he inserts a finger. 

How long since the last time he did this by himself, he doesn't even remember. The sensation feels new. He closes his eyes, managing to add another one and only feeling a slight pain.

"Fuck, I wish you could see yourself." Bobby moves closer so he can unbutton Hanbin's shirt, exposing his chest but not removing the uniform, loosening up the bow tie, Hanbin continues to finger himself, searching for that one particular spot he couldn't seem to find. "I'm gonna fuck you like this, bury my cock so deep inside that you couldn't walk for days. Fuck." 

Before he knew it, Bobby was also poking his hole with his own finger, going in with one smooth slide, alongside his two. They lock gazes. And lips. Bobby guides their fingers into the spot that gets Hanbin mewling, biting on Bobby's lip and drawing blood as he moans in his mouth. 

Bobby presses on again, his lips traveling on Hanbin's chest, flicking his tongue on his hard nipple as he brushes the pad of his finger on Hanbin's prostate. 

"You don't know how much control you have over me." Bobby says, his words falling on his skin as kisses and nips. 

But, Hanbin does. Otherwise, he wouldn't be embarrassing himself like this just to make Bobby give in. 

"All you did was call me, let me hear your voice, tell me you missed me and I was back to being a lovesick fool, like a fucking dog wagging its tail waiting for your command." Bobby removes his finger—Hanbin follows—and rolls a condom as he pushes himself inside Hanbin, releasing a few grunts before he was all in. He stills.

"And after this, you'd be back on your old ways. Avoiding me like the plague—_fuck_." he thrusts, mouthing on Hanbin's neck as the latter closes his eyes tightly, panting. "Because you only like the chase. You hate it when I don't pay attention to you and when I do, you go back to making me run after you. You want me wrapped around your little finger, right?" he bit on his shoulder and Hanbin sobs, feeling overwhelmed everytime Bobby thrusts inside him, hot and throbbing.

"You said you love me, do you mean that?" Bobby halts, and Hanbin opens his eyes, nodding obediently. 

"I love you." he mutters.

Bobby kisses him as he changes their position without letting him go, he lets Hanbin move on top of him, lips still locked as Hanbin fucks himself on his cock. 

"Jiwon—ahhh." Hanbin stills and buries his face on Bobby's neck. Bobby continues to fuck him, never letting him breathe, coaxing a few more moans from his lips. He lifts his skirt up and touches himself, fucking his fist and Bobby's cock.

Bobby wraps his hand on top of Hanbin's fingers fisted on his own cock, he makes him let go and Hanbin releases himself, holding onto Bobby's shoulder as Bobby pumps him all while fucking into him. "Be mine, Kim Hanbin. Be with me." he tries to catch Hanbin's gaze.

Hanbin looks into his deep brown eyes, and he drowns in it, he has no idea how to swim. "I will. I am." 

Bobby kisses him for what feels like the hundredth time, cutting out his breath and making him live off the little air between kisses. 

He thrusts into him ruthlessly, his hand stroking with the exact same pace as they come together. He muffles his moans on Hanbin's shoulder and Hanbin bites on his, shuddering when he wipes the come off the tip of Hanbin's cock.

"I will fuck you in different places so you won't ever forget me. And everywhere you go, you'll be haunted by the memories of my cock buried in your tight little ass with only my name escaping your lips."

  
///////

  
"Junhoe, shut the fuck up. Everyone knows you're Joker." Jinhwan says, kissing Junhoe on the lips when he pouts.

"Yikes, get a room, please." Chanwoo glares at the couple before nodding at the newly arrived Bobby and Hanbin.

Yunhyeong organized a Halloween Party. Which turned out better than last time. It's just them and their few circle of friends. 

Hanbin smiles at Nayeon and his girlfriend as they come out of the kitchen holding boxes of pizzas, both wearing an Elle Woods costume.

"I swear we didn't talk about this. When I came to fetch her, I recognized we were both dressed up as Elle Woods. Except I have a better wig." Nayeon said earlier when they interrogated her about the costume.

Chanwoo and Yunhyeong were so into it, they even had prosthetics on. 

Bobby and Hanbin didn't coordinate their costumes, they were too busy to do so. Bobby went as Clyde from Bonnie and Clyde and Hanbin went as James Dean, pre-car crash. 

Yunhyeong tells him he didn't even try to put an effort as he was only wearing a plain white shirt and a leather jacket. But Hanbin ignores him and munches on the pizza. 

Junhoe emerges out of the kitchen with a tray of jell-o shots. "Hey, Bin." he eyes his costume and tries to think of a compliment. "Nice top."

"Than—"

"I have a name, you know." Bobby interrupts him. 

Junhoe chokes, Chanwoo roars in laughter.

"Kim Jiwon, what the hell?"

Bobby smiles playfully and kisses the top of Hanbin's forehead. Out of habit, whenever the latter gets annoyed with him.

He could live like this.

It's all he ever wanted. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading and waiting! the ending was actually inspired by this meme:
> 
> https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/alfzd1/i_have_a_name/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share


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